Over two months ago, Dirk Nowitzki and the Mavericks made a vow not to go anywhere near a razor until they were a respectable .500 team. The facial hair reached epic, disgusting levels, but last night Dallas finally reached their goal in New Orleans, and the beards went away. Per ESPN: “It took the Dallas Mavericks 121 days to get back to .500. It took Dirk Nowitzki maybe 90 seconds to get rid of the beard he has been growing for most of that time. ‘That shave felt amazing,’ Nowitzki said after a 107-89 victory over the New Orleans Hornets improved the Mavs’ record to 40-40. ‘There was some food caught in there from a few weeks ago.’ [...] After the final buzzer sounded, Nowitzki made a beeline for the Mavs’ locker room, picked up his razor and began bushwhacking. The beard was gone by the time coach Rick Carlisle addressed the team. After that meeting, Nowitzki and his trusty razor ‘cleaned up the rest on the neck and behind the ears and the nose hair a little bit.’ Said O.J. Mayo: ‘I need a barber to get mine. I’ve got to go see Omar the barber. I might get too trigger happy.’ Can you blame the Mavs’ 25,000-point man for being in such a hurry to get rid of the beard? Never mind that he claims that his wife, Jessica, has refused to kiss him for a couple of months. It has been a long, tough climb back to .500 for a franchise accustomed to 50-win seasons.”