by Marcel Mutoni

My fellow basketball fans, our long (inter)national nightmare is over: After months of hand-wringing, international intrigue, strange (and often hilarious) requests, frustration, and general confusion, the Milwaukee Bucks have finally inked first round pick Yi Jianlian.

After Bucks owner Herb Kohl made a trip to Hong Kong to conduct personal negotiations with Yi’s representatives, the young Chinese star signed a multiyear deal with the Bucks, ending a saga that began on draft night when he was selected with the sixth overall pick by Milwaukee.

“We all anticipate Yi’s arrival and welcome him and his family to Milwaukee,” Kohl said. “We look forward to a successful relationship for many years to come.”

“We have also secured some of the finest Chinese hotties in the entire city of Milwaukee for Eazy Yi to choose from,” Kohl did not add.

On a serious note, can you imagine how much pressure to perform Yi is going to be under once the season starts? And it will be unfair, because from the day he was drafted, it was painfully clear that his handlers were the ones delaying his signing by making ridiculous demands and threatening that he might just stay in China if the Bucks didn’t trade him.

Best of luck in the League, Yi. You’ll need it.