Ron Artest to the Knicks: ‘I Can Save You’

by Marcel Mutoni

If you’re the sort that roots for the Knicks – poor you – I surely hope you’re not anticipating 2008 to be much different than the previous year. Things will not change. The team is still going to be terrible, coach Zeke isn’t leaving anytime soon, and your savior in waiting is … Ron Artest?

Yes. Ron-Ron, who has made a habit of talking about wanting to join this depressing lot, thinks he can save the Knicks from themselves and wouldn’t oppose a trade to the Big Apple.

“Anywhere I go, I can turn things around, given the opportunity,” Artest said. “I definitely would not be opposed to it if that is my calling. I would not be opposed if something would happen [with the Knicks]. But I just want to win a championship.”

Though his tough-as-nails defense would certainly help the squad, unless he can also perform exorcisms, Artest cannot save the Knicks. I’m not sure anyone can really. Besides, rumors continue to swirl that the Miami Heat are still very interested in Ron’s services.

For what it’s worth, Isiah says the team isn’t looking to make any moves before the trade deadline, because you know, everything is just rosy in the World’s Most Shameless.