Wednesday, June 23rd, 2010 at 2:20 pm  |  23 responses

Because Steve Nash Likes It

An insider’s look at the comings and goings of the World Cup.

by Colin Powers

So I’m out here in South Africa, and I am here because I stumbled upon what can only be the residue of divine favor. In the early hours of a May, New York morning, I received a phone call from a cousin I hadn’t heard much from in recent years. Now, these random drop-ins do happen from time to time, inevitable when you have over 50 such relations. Indeed, my mother’s family, where she is one of 11 children, embodies the stereotypical ethos of an era in Ireland well before the crass modernity and narcissism of the Celtic Tiger, an era when the Catholic Church reigned with ultimate authority, Priests didn’t touch little children (or at least didn’t get caught), and birth control was a heathen’s luxury. Anyway, without drifting too far in to historical polemics and the reasons why England can be blamed for all Ireland’s woes up until this recent economic disaster (maybe that too), I have a very big family. Furthermore, this over-achieving family of impoverished, agrarian heritage has begotten a generation of children spread across the economic landscape, one of whom has ascended to become a big man in turf studies and management. It was this cousin who phoned me, inquiring if I would like to come out to South Africa on his company’s dime to lend a hand in testing out the pitches, provide fodder for humor because of my Americanness (yes, most Europeans do still seem to think we’re all stupid and Bushian and gun-toting and God fearing and ‘lacking in subtlety’), and help out in an assortment of ways as young people without any established craft or skill-set are known to do. Nepotism is pretty cool when it’s in your favor, I must say.

As is such, this job has provided incredible access to the country of South Africa as well as World Cup operations and politicking from an angle that may or may not be somewhat interesting depending of course on the reader. If the social and racial dynamics of this vibrantly evolving nation is not your bag of tea, well, shit, good thing there are 10,000 media people covering the event who can probably provide something more to your liking. If the size of Thierry Henry’s ass (sorta big, he looked a little out of shape but he’s a big dude in general up close), the inner fat kid that Yohan Gourcuff’s style of running reveals when within shouting distance, or the unanimous distaste of the boisterous Cape Town crowd for French Manager Raymond Domenech also bores, you needn’t waste any more time with me. That being said, because of this J-O-B, I have been afforded a somewhat clandestine vantage point through which to observe the comings and goings and inner-workings of the Cup and all its surroundings (including a standing sideline position at a number of matches). Self-involved and self-important as is the fundamental and underlying nature of my generation, I figure I should write about this and share my perspective, wonderful observations and the other elements of egoism that come along with it. At least I am also self-aware.

I have attached some writing put together over the past 10 days or so. Parts might not be the most timely, but hopefully can help paint a picture of the scene out here.

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  • http://slamonline.com Ben Osborne

    So thorough, Colin. It is awesome that you are there…thanks for all these timely words.

  • http://www.sonicbids.com doyouwantmore

    Soccer is boring. I don’t care how trendy or worldly or sophisticated it would make me to pretend I like it, and I don’t care that I might like it if I attempt to understand the intricacies and tactics the athletes and coaches use. They hardly ever score. They flop like crazy. It’s boring.

  • http://www.sonicbids.com doyouwantmore

    Now I feel like a jerk because I could have kept that to myself. Sorry for peeing on the good vibes contained within the above article.

  • http://www.twitter.com/gerardhimself Gerard Himself

    “They flop like crazy. It’s boring.” have you seen an NBA game in the last 5 years?

  • The Fresh Prince of Nsam

    @ doyouwantmore: I feel the exact same thing about Baseball (BORING!!!) So don’t be sorry. It’s cultural. But I’ve met some Americans here in London who like football thaugh, plus Team USA is a descent one, they made the last 16 as Number 1 of their group, while my team Cameroon (where football is the 1st religion) was the 1st country outta the tourmament. What a shame. Go Ghana, Beat USA!

  • mAMba

    Great read

  • Jake

    Soccer is actually pretty interesting if you take the time to get involved with it.It’s much more fun to watch and is a lot easier to appreciate if you actually play the sport too instead of watching.For me that is the only way you are able to understand the game!

  • deano

    soccer is dope. Don’t think so?? watch Ronaldinho highlight on youtube….you’ll instantly become a football fan

  • Elias

    Soccer is cool, but it’s usually boring as hell, I know what I’m talking about, I live in Europe and I’ve watched alot of high level football like the world cup, champions league or La Liga, and they never score, I watched like 4 hours of wolrd cup until they scored and I was at the fridge that time, and then it took like another 4 hours until somebody scored again, and they flop much more than people do in basketball.

  • http://shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com/ Tariqُُ

    Out of the four names, you’ve got 3 possibilities:

    1- Magic is the only basketball player among four soccer players.
    2- Dooley is the only average player among three all-time greats.
    3- You actually mean Steve Zissou and not Zizou, so this Wes Anderson character would be the odd man out among three professional athletes.

    Dollar, please!

  • http://shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com/ Tariqُُ

    Soccer can be boring, but it can also be exhilarating.
    Uruguay v France = boring.
    Brazil v Cote d’Ivoire = pretty good.
    Germany v Italy at the last WC = classic.

  • hoodsnake

    I loved it when we smashed France. Long Street was up all night after that win although we got knocked out.

  • http://www,myczechrepublic.com SAB

    thanks Colin, awesome article, sounds like you’re really taking advantage of a fantastic opportunity. great critique of the English fans/media/team too… it’s a strange strange situation. England-Germany on Sunday should be a fantastic match.

  • http://hibachi20.blogspot.com/ Moose

    Guys, soccer can seem boring to somebody who doesn’t know it well the same way baseball can. A match is a process that has it’s moments, if not full of boom-boom-boom excitement.

  • http://shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com/ Tariqُُ

    Moose:
    Actually, baseball is boring from an objective standpoint. It’s a scientifically proven fact.

  • Izzo

    You know what else is boring? Things I don’t like.

  • deano

    Soccer is exciting as a mug, you really just have to play it to understand. Its not all about goals its about skills, control, passing, striking, in a lot of ways it reminds me of basketball. You can be as creative as you want with the ball on your foot. I played soccer in HS my sophmore year cause I didn’t make the basketball team, had a straight BLAST! It truly is the beautiful game.

  • BubbaChuck4Pres

    This has been bugging me and hope someone can give me an answer. Why exactly are you not allowed to set screens in soccer? That would make this sport a lot more enjoyable to watch.

  • hoodsnake

    Because of offside rules Bubba. Look it up.

  • BubbaChuck4Pres

    @hoodsnake- I thought you were good on the offsides issue as long as there are defenders between the ball and goal. So, what is stopping a teammate from setting a screen/pick when the ball is being advanced up the field (similar to say setting a pick at the top of the key in basketball)?

  • http://www.slamonline.com Colin Powers

    Hey Bubba,
    I’m not sure why they don’t allow screens. Impeding someone’s path is whistled as obstruction in soccer. It really would open up a lot of chances and space though. Maybe they’re worried about the speed of collisions because there is so much open space on the field.

  • max
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