Wednesday, June 23rd, 2010 at 2:20 pm  |  23 responses

Because Steve Nash Likes It

An insider’s look at the comings and goings of the World Cup.

Cape Town is pulsing with the mass migration of English supporters in to the city as their match against Algeria sits only a few hours away. They bring with them their pasty, virgin white skin, enthusiastic donning of sunglasses, Christmas morning type excitement at having a pint outside, and choruses of ‘God Save the Queen.’ Local cover bands sharpen their chords and make an honest attempt at Liam Gallagher’s most unique of singing styles in readying their inevitable renditions of ‘Wonderwall’ throughout the British invasion, and everyone keeps their wives and daughters at home in lieu of John Terry’s arrival.

To a great extent the English are good fun, most of the hooligans victims of integrated international custom’s policies which blacklisted them from the country. Nevertheless, the everyday British Joe (we’ll call him Jeeves) still has that latent impulse to scrap buried just beneath the surface. Walking along the oceanfront promenade yesterday afternoon, I saw a British man no younger than 55 stumbling along and only kept standing by his friend’s stable embrace, bleeding from a number of open facial wounds. Shit, age is only a number.

I must admit, beyond those bewildering eccentricities, those Brits do bring a great atmosphere with them. Watching the universally enjoyed Mexican defeat of the French at an Irish Pub up Long St., there was a palpable injection of energy courtesy of our former colonial masters. Support was unanimous for El Tri, who look to be a lock for advancement barring anything wildly unforeseen in their final match against Uruguay. The crew of 15 or 20 Mexican patrons probably received more awkward hugs from random white strangers than they ever had in their lives up to this point. I passed along my own congratulationAlgeria fanss to a number of them, who warmly received it initially, responding, ‘Thank you, are you Australian?’ Revealing my Yankee origins prompted a shift in mood to something between mistrust and hostility (Because of a distaste for Americans or American soccer I cannot be certain). I gave a college try at commiserating and insisting on a genuine support for our neighbors in this here World Cup but they weren’t feeling the kid too much.

That is not to say all international mediating efforts were a failure last night. Amongst the jovial crowd at the pub was a decently sized group of Algerians vibing on the pre-match nightlife. Buzzed on a quietly growing number of beers, I felt compelled to follow Obama’s initiative from the Cairo speech and make a grassroots appeal for Algerian-American solidarity. Paraphrasing from a slightly hazy memory, the following transpired:

Me: ‘LET’S GO ALGERIA!!!’

Them: ‘YES MY BROTHER, LET’S GO ALGERIA!’

Me: ‘FUCK THE BRITS. GO ON LADS, I’M PULLING FOR YOU BIG TIME TOMORROW.’

Them: ‘THANK YOU MY FRIEND. ARE YOU IRISH?’

Me: ‘NAH, I’M ACTUALLY AMERICAN BUT I’M NOT A DICK, I PROMISE. YOU GUYS ARE GONNA BUST THEM ENGLISH TOMORROW.’

Them: [laughing] ‘OK MY BROTHER. THANK YOU, THANK YOU. GOOD LUCK AS WELL. WE WILL DRINK TO THAT.’

Cool guys. We chilled for a good bit, shot the shit, shared some sympathies and built some camaraderie all of which was allowed and triggered by the mutual enemy of the English (at least an enemy in the immediate sense of the next couple hours). And I thought my anti-English rhetoric would never lead me anywhere.

Will this exchange prove to be a watershed moment in shifting the narrative of American relations with the Islamic world, completely taking the sting off the pressing realities in Iraq, Afghanistan, Palestine, etc? I can’t be certain, but if it comes to fruition, you will have heard it here first.

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  • http://slamonline.com Ben Osborne

    So thorough, Colin. It is awesome that you are there…thanks for all these timely words.

  • http://www.sonicbids.com doyouwantmore

    Soccer is boring. I don’t care how trendy or worldly or sophisticated it would make me to pretend I like it, and I don’t care that I might like it if I attempt to understand the intricacies and tactics the athletes and coaches use. They hardly ever score. They flop like crazy. It’s boring.

  • http://www.sonicbids.com doyouwantmore

    Now I feel like a jerk because I could have kept that to myself. Sorry for peeing on the good vibes contained within the above article.

  • http://www.twitter.com/gerardhimself Gerard Himself

    “They flop like crazy. It’s boring.” have you seen an NBA game in the last 5 years?

  • The Fresh Prince of Nsam

    @ doyouwantmore: I feel the exact same thing about Baseball (BORING!!!) So don’t be sorry. It’s cultural. But I’ve met some Americans here in London who like football thaugh, plus Team USA is a descent one, they made the last 16 as Number 1 of their group, while my team Cameroon (where football is the 1st religion) was the 1st country outta the tourmament. What a shame. Go Ghana, Beat USA!

  • mAMba

    Great read

  • Jake

    Soccer is actually pretty interesting if you take the time to get involved with it.It’s much more fun to watch and is a lot easier to appreciate if you actually play the sport too instead of watching.For me that is the only way you are able to understand the game!

  • deano

    soccer is dope. Don’t think so?? watch Ronaldinho highlight on youtube….you’ll instantly become a football fan

  • Elias

    Soccer is cool, but it’s usually boring as hell, I know what I’m talking about, I live in Europe and I’ve watched alot of high level football like the world cup, champions league or La Liga, and they never score, I watched like 4 hours of wolrd cup until they scored and I was at the fridge that time, and then it took like another 4 hours until somebody scored again, and they flop much more than people do in basketball.

  • http://shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com/ Tariqُُ

    Out of the four names, you’ve got 3 possibilities:

    1- Magic is the only basketball player among four soccer players.
    2- Dooley is the only average player among three all-time greats.
    3- You actually mean Steve Zissou and not Zizou, so this Wes Anderson character would be the odd man out among three professional athletes.

    Dollar, please!

  • http://shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com/ Tariqُُ

    Soccer can be boring, but it can also be exhilarating.
    Uruguay v France = boring.
    Brazil v Cote d’Ivoire = pretty good.
    Germany v Italy at the last WC = classic.

  • hoodsnake

    I loved it when we smashed France. Long Street was up all night after that win although we got knocked out.

  • http://www,myczechrepublic.com SAB

    thanks Colin, awesome article, sounds like you’re really taking advantage of a fantastic opportunity. great critique of the English fans/media/team too… it’s a strange strange situation. England-Germany on Sunday should be a fantastic match.

  • http://hibachi20.blogspot.com/ Moose

    Guys, soccer can seem boring to somebody who doesn’t know it well the same way baseball can. A match is a process that has it’s moments, if not full of boom-boom-boom excitement.

  • http://shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com/ Tariqُُ

    Moose:
    Actually, baseball is boring from an objective standpoint. It’s a scientifically proven fact.

  • Izzo

    You know what else is boring? Things I don’t like.

  • deano

    Soccer is exciting as a mug, you really just have to play it to understand. Its not all about goals its about skills, control, passing, striking, in a lot of ways it reminds me of basketball. You can be as creative as you want with the ball on your foot. I played soccer in HS my sophmore year cause I didn’t make the basketball team, had a straight BLAST! It truly is the beautiful game.

  • BubbaChuck4Pres

    This has been bugging me and hope someone can give me an answer. Why exactly are you not allowed to set screens in soccer? That would make this sport a lot more enjoyable to watch.

  • hoodsnake

    Because of offside rules Bubba. Look it up.

  • BubbaChuck4Pres

    @hoodsnake- I thought you were good on the offsides issue as long as there are defenders between the ball and goal. So, what is stopping a teammate from setting a screen/pick when the ball is being advanced up the field (similar to say setting a pick at the top of the key in basketball)?

  • http://www.slamonline.com Colin Powers

    Hey Bubba,
    I’m not sure why they don’t allow screens. Impeding someone’s path is whistled as obstruction in soccer. It really would open up a lot of chances and space though. Maybe they’re worried about the speed of collisions because there is so much open space on the field.

  • max
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