Monday, July 15th, 2013 at 12:04 pm  |  8 responses

Meet Rack ‘The Ball Hawk’ Parkins (VIDEO)

The Ball Hawk hounds his opponents like nobody else can.

Basketball is played on both ends of the court, but Rack Parkins is really just concerned with one—defense, and only defense. This guy is a straight-up defensive force, hounding opponents into coughing up turnovers and launching dumb shots, but he’s not too useful when his team has the rock, as he often struggles to contribute in even the smallest ways on the offensive end. He’ll probably need a new pair of sneakers soon, but copping new kicks because his sneaks are constantly worn out is a routine part of The Ball Hawk’s life.

Kevin “The Big Dog” Durant
Anton “The Spark Plug” Barrels
Spooner “The Trash-Talker” Dee
Jade “The Over-Dribbler” Yorker
Darrell “The Motivator” Belts

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  • Dfrance

    Is it just me, or are these ads not funny at all? Like, they should be funny, but the actors stink. Or maybe its the director. Idk.

  • LLC#12

    They are OK, but I agree, they have the potential to be a lot funnier, the concept is quite funny, but the execution…

  • LakeShow

    Co-Sign. It’s on the verge, but they are missing something.

  • shockexchange

    Wonder if Nike will do a spoof on the guy who always aligns himself with “exceptionally more talent than the rest of the L” so he can win a chip. Now that would be funny.

  • marko

    dude get a life

  • LakeShow

    I totally feel like wasting my time on someone who doesn’t understand the difference between a 1st and 4th option.

  • RKJ92

    just saw this now, loooolllll!

  • Will Lee

    Tony Allen