Thursday, January 15th, 2009 at 10:30 am  |  25 responses

Dikembe Mutombo, the Rockets’ Own Dick Cheney

Deke, don’t ever stop being you: “My hands are full with all the things I need to reach all of these young guys before I leave the game. I’m not done yet. Just let me get them into the bunker like Vice President Cheney. I won’t start any wars. And I won’t shoot anybody in the hunting field either. Everything’s gonna be fine.”

More Mutombo goodness: “I’m very critical,” Mutombo said. “Those are bull. I told him that. He’s too tall to be taking charges. He needs to learn to play defense without using his chest. You don’t block a shot with you chest. You block it with your hands…Maybe Yao is listening to Shane (Battier). Maybe he wants to be a guard or something. Man, I’ve got a lot of things to work on. Maybe he’s planning to lead the league charges. So I have to stop him. I have to teach him to lead the league in blocked shots, not charges.”

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  • http://www.hibachi20.blogspot.com Hursty

    Can you imagine how hard it would have been to transcribe that for the journalist? lol I heart Deke. He’s a good dude. And funny.

  • http://slamonline.com Tzvi T

    Yao needs to play big on O and D; especially now that he’s battling with Tmac.

  • http://hibachi20.blogspot.com/ BETCATS


  • http://twentythreenine.blogspot.com Russ Bengtson

    We need audio, especially of the Dick Cheney comment. “Hey Cheney. You still work for government?” Also, big man needs a cabinet appointment or an ambassadorship or something.

  • http://docfunk.blogspot.com Doc Funk

    Secretary of Defense

  • http://www.lkz.ch/basket Darksaber

    FAN-TAS-TIC. Old school african tough guy. Deke, you rule.

  • http://www.bbl.org.uk Josh D

    Well, i guess you can’t argue with the four time DPOY

  • ENDS

    Its gone be a sad two weeks when Deke retires

  • ENDS

    then comes back in celtic green! Uptop!

  • http://sdfjklf.com Jukai

    You don’t defend with your chest! I love Mutombo.

  • http://www.lkz.ch/basket Darksaber

    Hmm, there was a Lindsay Lohan joke buried in there… just slipped away.

  • Pingback: Both Teams Played Hard » Blog Archive » Dikembe Will Not Shoot Anyone in the Face

  • http://ittakesanationofmillionstoholdthissac.blogspot.com ciolkstar

    I love Mutombo. He’s an all time great player, character, and his advice here is right on the money.

  • http://theghostofroyhobbs.blogspot.com Mo Charlo

    I can’t believe nobody’s written it yet…WHO WANTS TO SEX MUTOMBO?!?!?!?!

  • http://thesportsdiaryonline.blogspot.com Roy

    Deke rules!!! :D

  • http://www.nba.com Tarzan’s Jane

    Way to be classy Mo Charlo! But for real, Mutombo is the best and he is beginning to be my favorite player, instead of who I have been liking in the past. I was thrilled to see him come off the bench the other night.

  • http://www.myspace.com/hemantsbeats what

    I can say for a fact that nobody wants to sex Dick Cheney.

  • http://hibachi20.blogspot.com Moose

    Oh, the headline was deceiving: I thought he accidentally shot T-Mac thinking that he was a sleeping deer (Tracy got tired on the hunting trip), and that was why he hasn’t been playing.

  • collin


  • http://thesportsdiaryonline.blogspot.com Roy

    Co-sign @ collin.

  • collin

    Eddy curry might want to

  • je708

    Mt. Mutombo will never be conquered.

  • wilz

    I think the eddy curry jokes already got old

  • http://slamonline.com the sultan

    may be mutumbo can try playing defense on shaq for a change. 2001 finals any one?

  • Diogo

    Doc Funk, that’s one of the best nicknames for Mutombo. Love the quote “He’s too tall to be taking charges…maybe he’s listening to Shane.”.