Thursday, January 22nd, 2009 at 11:00 am  |  64 responses

The All-Star Uniforms Can Give You Wings … Allegedly

by Marcel Mutoni

Each year, for its mid-season extravaganza, the NBA and its various business partners get together and unleash a hideous set of uniforms on an unsuspecting public. After the initial shock, we grudgingly accept the garments and agree to suffer through them for an evening.

This season, the uniforms are once again sharply displeasing to the eye, but they’re technologically advanced! Supposedly.

USA Today explains:

The specially made uniforms for the Feb. 15 All-Star Game in Phoenix (the starters will be announced at 7 p.m. Thursday on TNT) are the lightest and most technologically advanced to wear. They are 30% lighter than traditional uniforms. Previously, layers of twill were sewn together, making the uniforms heavier. The new ones also allow less friction because of the reduction of seams.

The Techfit PowerWeb compression-base layer, worn underneath the uniform, can improve a player’s vertical jump by 4%, said Lawrence Norman, vice president of global basketball for Adidas: “This is more revolutionary than evolutionary. These products can help you play better.”

A 4% increase in vertical leaping ability might not sound like a lot to you, but it’s pretty considerable if said player already possesses a 40-inch vert. They might just have to raise the rims in Phoenix come February 15th.

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  • ENDS


  • ENDS

    I like em

  • Coconut


  • ENDS

    is this what our tax dollars go to light space age uniforms

  • Squirrel7

    I actually think they’re ok. I like the East one, and they are much better than last year’s mess, where the back of one was the same colour as the front of the other, making it a nightmare when watching on TV!

  • Coconut

    damn… I don’t like ‘em :p Can’t quite say what it is, but something is wrong with em…

  • ENDS

    Naw son you gotta call that straight up

  • ENDS

    The blue one is sick

  • ENDS

    i just wish the League would go away from the Red white and Blue things and Mix it up a lil bit. I thought they would throwback the 95 purple jerseys. now that would’ve been sick

    can still see penny wearing that bandaid and us imitating it the next day

  • Coconut

    last couple of years I liked the vegas ones best. They were flashy, but not overdoing it like the new orleans ones. These look like the ones the legend teams have on the nba 2k games…

  • http://www.shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com Eboy

    They’re not terrible, although they should have gone retro with an updated version of the 96 one with the cactus on it.

  • http://www.shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com/ TADOne

    The East blue ones are nice. I just may cop one.

  • Squirrel7

    I wonder if I could get a retro Vin Baker all-star jersey from ’96…….

  • http://slamonline.com Lang Whitaker

    I’m confused, are the Jazz playing in the All-Star Game?

  • Diesel

    As long as they finally solved the friction problem with the jerseies I’m happy. There’s no place for nipple chaffing in this league.

  • http://its-mitch.blogspot.com/ Paps

    Too bland. Let’s see some spice.

  • http://www.bbl.org.uk Josh D

    I like them

  • ENDS

    you want spice look up 96 San Antonio all star unis

  • Young Chris MP3

    What is the science based on here?

  • ENDS

    Cue the Piano
    Were not completely whack happens

  • ENDS

    where anything is better than last years happens

  • jsmoove

    on a different note, does anyone know what happened to greg anthony? i haven’t seen him on espn for a long time.

  • http://www.slamonline.com GotHandles?

    they look like WNBA UNIFORMS

  • ENDS

    ^where metrosexual happens

  • http://hibachi20.blogspot.com/ BETCATS

    one day they are gonna be so light weight that everybody is naked with a ASG tatto on their chest and their number on their back (ala DeShawn Stevenson)

  • Pro

    There not as bad as the Thunder’s unis though

  • ENDS

    there are no bad Deshawn refrences

  • http://www.lkz.ch Darksaber

    still way better than the gold/silver joints. Or those fugly teal ones from san antonio, where shaq nearly decapitated the admiral with a nuclear dunk

  • riggs

    that represents phoenix/arizona…..how exactly?

  • vmcb

    They’re better than last years.

  • ENDS

    in no way whatsoever

  • http://www.lkz.ch Darksaber

    umm naked hmm? C’mon now BET!!

  • ENDS

    The Last Name goes under the Number, ala Sacto Kings back in the Day. why would you do that adidas? I now officially hate them

  • ENDS

    They actually dont look that bad once you start playing with the names on the personalizer @the L’s .com

  • ENDS

    They have certain players throwbacks from 95

  • Son of Shawn

    Well, at least this year we can difference one team from another (last year was a nightmare to watch), but NBA can go really global and use more than three colors in the All-Star (were the West perennial starter pivot will be chinese until he retires, and Eazy-Yi and the Monkey King will be starters in an All-Star when chinese population decide it)

  • http://www.another48minutes.blogspot.com Gerard Himself

    I like the East ones, they’re okay. Wouldn’t buy one though, but maybe that’s also because I’m broke.

  • http://www.lkz.ch Darksaber

    fascinating the many references to the 96 cactus asg unis. Those sure seem to have left an impression on all linkstigators. Probably cause of their pure hideousness;) or maybe cause mj came back for real that season ? (loss to orlando in the playoffs before that did NOT happen)

  • http://docfunk.blogspot.com Doc Funk

    Beekeepers vs Space Marines. Just like I always imagined.

  • Dikembe Mutombo Mpolondo Mukamba Jean-Jacques Wamutombo

    i am saddened that my georgetown brethern is retiring, i wish him the best

  • http://www.where-basketball-b-longs.blogspot.com/ B. Long

    Nice threads.

  • http://www.manutd.com Z

    What the eff? Jerseys that make you jump higher? Is this swimming now?

  • http://slamonline.com Russ Bengtson

    It’s the Jazz versus the Heat.

  • http://hibachi20.blogspot.com Moose

    Not bad. Increases the vertical by 4%? What would that be, like a sixth of an inch for the average guy?

  • http://www.myspace.com/hemantsbeats what

    Seriously, this does look like some wnba sh!t.

  • Bryant Reeves

    4% increase of a 40 inch vertical is 1.6 inches – that is a massive improvement. Are they going to wear these unis in the dunk contest? Honestly though I think Addidas needs to redo their math. How does a 30% reduction in jersey weight lead to a 4% increase in vertical? Did the old jerseys weigh 5 pounds?

  • Bryant Reeves

    should have read it more closely – the 4% increase in vertical has nothing to do with the jersey – it is from the crazy compression shirt they wear UNDER the jersey

  • thesubwayconnection

    They could be worse.

  • melvin ely

    wait I’m confused…if the unis are so light that it increases vert by 4%, would that mean a higher percentage when the players get nekkid?

  • Will Lee

    makes them lighter and heavier?

  • rusty


  • wilz

    4%? ya right..

  • jay

    too bad nike did this first with the usa redeem team jerseys….nike> adidas both in footwear and uniforms..nuff said!!!

  • jay

    nike did this first with the usa jerseys!

    nike> adidas both in footwear and uniforms..nuff said!!

  • Teddy-the-Bear

    @ jay: Nope.

  • LilBlue4rmthaO

    Since they playin in AZ,Y dont tha West wear they own home jerseys and the East wear away? Guess its to much like rite

  • LilBlue4rmthaO

    Since they playin in AZ,Y dont tha West wear they own home jerseys and the East wear away? Guess its to much like rite

  • Nosebleed Seats

    Heat vs. Jazz?
    Heat vs. Grizzlies?
    Heat vs. Titans?

  • pigott17

    they kick last years one in the teeth

    if i player realies on how light his uni is to jump tht would be rather sad

  • Gaz

    @BETCUNTS, One day you are going to be so lightweight that a fully-functioning human brain isn’t even needed to create a comeback to destroy you… oh nevermind BETTY that day has long since arrived.

  • Aussie Kidd

    think Gaz has some beef with BET?
    also, Nosebleed, I wish Heat vs Titans, to see Chris Johnson is the ASG!

    Kerry Collins, not so much.

  • Blinguo

    BET’s comment wasn’t flame/bait worthy at all considering that Promo commercial about the dunk contest props for Dwight Howard that is already on TV. Jameer Nelson said “no clothes, body paint.” What a great way to end a commercial. (Bad writers + Jameer actually agreeing to say it = what today’s scene kids say a lot “AYO!”)

  • Blinguo

    And on topic. East looks okay, but not worth Authentic prices in this economy no doubt. Swingman won’t be super light and thus actually flimsier, so maybe that’s a buy on discount after the game when they have to sell them on clearance. Graphics up the sides remind me of NBA Jam tip offs where you have to mash the arcade buttons to get the POWER and possession.

  • Blinguo

    *Authentic = lighter and flimsier (for say, Darko to tear up easier), Swingman = mesh like stitched tackle twill and worth it more maybe, to clarify.