Tuesday, January 12th, 2010 at 1:08 pm  |  190 responses

Sure Shot

They say a picture’s worth 1,000 words. But you only need a couple to win.

Joakim NoahNo one questions the effort Joakim Noah gives on a nightly basis, but perhaps his shooting form says something about the way things are going for the hapless Bulls. Agree? Well, how would you caption this picture?

Whoever writes the funniest caption will win a dope prize from our vault and see their name in Trash Talk next issue.

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  • jim

    noah surprises the united center with trick spalding yo-yo.

  • http://Slamonline.com JROSALAN

    Shots like this, Most Improved Player of the Year is mine fa sho.

  • ian

    hit the rim + grab the rebound + dunk the ball+ pad my stats = people thinking I’m a better player then I actually am!

  • Ken


  • Jeff

    Joakim “Harry Potter” Noah controls the rock like a wizard!

  • http://www.yahoo.com logues

    “i’m gonna have to change my shorts at halftime”

  • http://slamonline.com Brad Long

    Maybe casting this spell on the ball will heighten my field goal percentage? And people laughed at me for reading Harry Potter.

  • http://slamonline.com/ niQ

    I wish DeRozan was on my team to make my misses look like intended alley-oop passes!

  • http://www.twitter.com/NotebookNick thesubwayconnection

    Use the Force, Joakim!

  • Mark Long


  • riggs


  • Stephen

    No Joakim,you are not Hedo, you cannot throw from the hip

  • http://www.voteforperk.blogspot.com KobeWearsAPurpleThong

    “Go go Gadget-Gravity!”

  • lAce

    (Noah)Man please dont block it! I got to get some stats!!

  • NAS

    “I really need to pee”

  • http://slamonline.com/ niQ


  • http://www.shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com/ TADOne

    Joakim forgets to practice for the Swedish shotput team on his own free time.

  • Bryce Henderson

    “Pikachu, I choose you!!”

  • http://slamonline.com nbk

    “and ya’ll thought shaq was a genie, Kazaam!”

  • European Idiot

    Joakim shows the NBA how they shoot the rock in Sweden…

  • David

    “Go to your home!”

  • ave. joe


  • J. Blackburn

    I knew when my dad taught me this forehand it would come in handy!

  • Double J

    GO WEB!

  • J. Blackburn

    I knew when my Dad taught me this forehand it would come in handy someday!

  • Anthony Pettaway

    I am the transformer. Gator turned Spiederman vs. Raptor! You can call Joakim Peter Parker the way he makes it happen! Hopefully CB4 didn’t watch Jurassic Park!

  • Tim

    Noah: Coach, I know what I’m doing. It’s a little something called the FORCE!!

  • Tim

    Noah: Screw basketball, shot put’s my game.

  • itaigruss


  • Tim

    Noah: C’mon now guys which one of you made the rim higher?!

  • http://fashionsensei.files.wordpress.com/2008/02/jackie-moon.jpg Jackie Moon

    The key to offensive rebounding: WILL the ball into your hand.

  • Ball For Life

    Dang it! My Spidey Senses aren’t tingling!

  • SchW

    OMG if i miss another sure shot, there goes my salary

  • http://www.laumol.nl/weblog Laumol

    “So this is a skyhook Yes?”

  • http://yahoo.com Chauncey Strange

    Noah: “note to self, call my bank and cancel the check payable to Peter Parker for my web-throwing lessons!!”

  • Chris Ujma

    ‘Seeing Lebron dancing in Row Z behind the backboard, Joakim takes aim….’

  • Chris Ujma

    ‘Hey Joakim, Dwight Howard spat on that ball last week….’

  • Chris Ujma

    ‘….and then he told me to put my fingers out like this. Yep, Gilbert Arenas really helped me with my shooting’

  • MikeC.

    Tiger style…Spalding throwing star!!!!!

  • Jacob (from Australia)

    “I’ve finally perfected the ugliest jump shot to match my shoes, face and hair!”

  • robert stewart

    “I won Skeet-Ball with this technique, maybe it’ll work here too” – Noah changing games at Dave & Busters

  • k

    It’s your friendly neighborhood Spider Man!

  • Dr.g.style

    I am scorpion from Mortal Kombat get over here

  • NBA kid

    and the hideously long rebound goes to calderon…

  • Dan

    Joakim fires up an alley-oops.

  • vic21

    to hell with shooting technique!!!!

  • http://www.youtube.com/ L

    “Joakim. Use the force”

  • http://www.youtube.com/ L

    “The floor is lava!”

  • jericho artuz

    CALDERON: Watda?
    NOAH: if we start winnin’ on a shot like this (the bulls is surging as of this writing) why not????

  • Harry Wilson

    man the form on my jump shot is so whack let me see how this looks oh yeah

  • Chit Saraswat

    Noah: “ewww it’s wet!”

  • Zarfan

    “The ball and Del Negro’s job is in the air. Which one should I care about?”

  • Zarfan

    Following in the footsteps of Curry and Chandler… Oh no.

  • Zarfan

    Noah goes up… and Eddie Vedder shakes his head.

  • JD

    Alley ooo …oppps – crap!

    After the ball went out of bound: “Kirk!!, why didn’t you jump!?”

  • Dillan

    Just like how my daddy does it when he serves!

  • Dillan

    “Son, you forgot your tennis racket! ” shouts Daddy Yannick

  • john

    Joakim Noah – I have the powerrr!!!
    jose Calderon – OHHH MYYY GOD!!!

  • hillbilly

    “NBA basketball: So easy a caveman can do it.”

  • Mattp

    “NBA player Noah heroically outstretches arm, trying to save falling ball.”

  • Manny

    “Micheal could dunk from the free throw line right ? maybe i can to ?”







  • http://www.luketynan.blogspot.com litetitan

    T-Mac made that self alley look so easy though?!

  • AnsonPanson


  • Kellen Nock

    Everyone wonders how Joakim increased his rebound rate so quickly…well, one person knows his secret. Obi-Wan Kinobi: “Use the force Joakim, use the force!!”

  • J_5heng

    “Hey Shawn Marion! Check out my shot!”

  • http://www.luketynan.blogspot.com litetitan

    My self-alley play gunna be FRESH come allstar weekend!

  • Ejike Wosu

    “where’d I learn to shoot?” Why’d you ask?

  • Martin


  • Mark

    Well…spiderman makes it look easy

  • http://staticseth.blogspot.com/ Seth

    The Force is strong with this one.

  • http://www.kb24.com The Seed

    With my eyes on the ball I will push the ball to the rim before Rupaul gets his hand on it.

  • pietro parrilla

    ” may the force be with me”

  • Diego

    Joakim “Get the f**k in there”.

  • Michael Langton

    This shooting technique helped me win two chips in florida! I wonder why it’s not working here?!

  • Michael

    Didn’t they say to aim at the basket?… Well, that’s what i’m doing but it aint goin in-

  • Silvia

    You can’t see it from where you are but there’s a fly on the rim. Yea, that did the trick-

  • Sherif

    Rose “What da hell…is he thinking!!”
    Noah thinking to him self “if i just fling it with my index finger like thiiis, besides if i miss it Dennis Rodman’s gonna grab the rebound”

  • Nesta Williams

    Noah: Maybe this will work “GO-Go Gadget shot”!!!

  • Born2Ball

    Coach Del Negro: Oh lord, lets pray for Noah’s ark.

  • James Hernandez

    babe come back

  • CDef28

    Noah: I release you, CHARZARD!

  • http://IdontthinktheLakersneedanymorescoring.whattheyneedisacenterthatfillsinalltheintangibles.AcenterlikeNoahwouldbeperfectforthelakersbecausehewoulddoallofthedirtyworkthatGasolOdomdontwanttobeaparto drock

    Aw man, I need a twenty second time out, I crapped my shorts again!

  • DJ

    I bet Al Horford cant do this!

  • Ali Saadat

    Joakim: This isn’t gonna help my All Star votes.

  • Balherett3

    Why am I using floaters it’s the shouldn’t Derrick be doing this?

  • Balherett3

    Why am I using floaters? Shouldn’t Derrick be doing this?

  • AJ

    Vinny Del Nigro: “God I wish I had someone else to send in.”
    *Michael Jordan whimpers softly from Nike headquarters*

  • LP

    “Constipated Noah flings a poo – ahem, the ball – and hopes something will stick to the backboard.” Meanwhile, Chris Bosh wishes he didn’t have to try and block the shot. Calderon and DeRozan are just confused – I thought this was basketball?

  • Brandon

    Noah,”I didn’t mean to let go!”

  • Brandon

    Noah,”Raptors…I choose you!”

  • Mikey v

    pistol pete who?

  • Gannon Rust

    Noah: Hey! This won me a couple championships at Florida!

  • J. Blackburn

    People courtside watch out because here comes an ace!

  • Will

    “Hold it right there Mr. Bosh. I gotta gun and I know how to use it, just don’t block my shot. Please?”

  • nate

    and we wonder why the bulls have had a sudden terrible year… at least Noah is batting a thousand, hes got awful hair, awful team, and awful shot. (the trifecta)

  • Hugo’s-Boss

    DeRozen: “this dude won a college chip and I didn’t?”

  • Samuel

    I am Yodakim Noah! Come to me basketball Come to me.

  • B. Masta

    The NBA: Where ‘to many nachos’ happens

  • Arman

    There’s been a tornado sighting in West Chicago on the 1900 block of West Madison. We advise you to seek shelter immediately.

  • Tim

    Noah: Be quiet Bosh, it’s all in the approach.

  • eugene vazemiller

    “Oh sh!t I dropped the soap!”

  • DD

    Coach Vinny: Use the force Noah!


  • http://www.slamonline.com SuperMan

    (Noah) Spalding, I choose you(like pokemon). (Calderon) Chris dont try to be hero, have some respect.

  • http://www.slamonline.com SuperMan

    (Noah) Bang! Bang! Gotcha back-iron. (Calderon) Chris head for the hills, Joakim the Kid has gone mad.

  • http://kicksoncard.tumblr.com zack

    Vinny Del Negro at next time out: “Joakim, I know you kind of look like Jar-Jar, but this is NOT Star Wars! Quit Trying to use The Force!!”

  • habeebeereseecup

    Joakim Noah was kung-fu fighting.
    Everyone else stood still just watching.
    In fact it was a little bit frightening.

  • the_baller20

    Urg!!! The things I could do if I actually knew how to shoot.

  • http://JoshDrake Josh D

    Look guys im spiderman!

  • Michael

    I wish they would let me focus on rebounds and bringing the energy- cause when I try to do to much this happens.

  • Elliot Weiss

    Who’s a good doggy? Yes you are! You are a good doggy Chris Bosh! Now GO FETCH!

  • Jobit E

    Oh no, I forgot my spiderman outfit at home, I’m in my Bulls uniform and thats not my web, thats the basketball, I hope it goes in though…

  • Daniel A

    Noah: Damn I can’t put up a skyhook, where the hell is Kareem when you need him.

    Bosh: I don’t even know why I have my hand up on this guy.

  • Rich G.


  • LeeRoy

    “I hope Jose didnt smell that.”

  • a soofi

    calderon: i hope chris blocks thats ugly thing or coach is going to kill me that i let this guy pass me

  • Jordan

    How come my spidey powers won’t work! Oh Calderon and Bosh are using the force to pull the ball away. Hey ref thats Force tending!

  • Muhammad Nathoo

    Noah: Shawn Marion can make it with his shooting style, so this had better go in. Not that it matters, because we’re down by 22

  • Jeffrey

    I am going to use the FORCE to push this ball IN.

  • http://www.cmoney116.blogspot.com Cyrus Mehrfar

    “Bosh told me I look like the Bulls logo, yeah well, he must not realize how much he looks like a Raptor. I’ll show him…BYAAAAAHHH!!!!

  • Sergio Rodriguez

    i call this shot the Kaaaa-meeee-haaaa-meeee-haa!

  • Ryan Brady

    You did what with Bosh last night? ewwwww!?!

  • http://www.twahc.blogspot.com twahc

    Noah: Damn, the rim is going to block it!

  • matt

    the raptors never did figure out noah’s arc

  • Coach_Adams

    “I just hate it when my yo-yo string breaks”, I will never be able to do around the world at this rate!

  • Coach_Adams

    May-be i should stick with my passtime of playing horse shoes, i might actually be able to win at that!

  • James Connaughton

    Noah Shows Off His New Yo-Yo Trick

  • matt

    the reason the raptors were not into noah’s arc

  • http://myspace.com/weezyleezy337 GametimeWeezy

    NBA “Where…umm…amazing happens”

  • Mason A

    Spiderman said if I shoot like this I will win Most Improved!

  • God Shamgod


  • AL Overbeek

    commentator: “and it appears that noah has no ark”

  • Brandon

    Noah unleashes the animals from his “arc”!

  • Nathan Bowditch


    (You know Street Fighter style…)

  • Nathan Bowditch

    Shoryu-ken (You know Ryu/Ken Street Fighter style…)

  • http://slamonline.com/contests Jacob Raygoza

    Maybe if i flick it in, i will make this shot

  • Ian

    Calderon: “That’s right young padawan. May the force be with you.”

  • http://aol.com Martin Fenn

    Noah: “Damn that shot was as ugly as you Bosh!”
    Noah talks a lot of trash

  • Luke Younger

    I command you to go in the hoop

  • http://slam.online isaac waggoner

    I better make this than i’ll have a stat for once

  • Celly Cel

    ‘Cause this is THRILLER…

  • Celly Cel

    “My Precious…”

  • Celly Cel

    “My precious…MINE!”

  • matt scott

    “The force is strong with u young jedi”

  • Bailey O’Brien

    ”Aww… MJ did it, why can’t I.”

  • Bailey O’Brien

    ”Aww….MJ could do it why can’t I”

  • matt

    joakim with his best iceman impersonation

  • Aristotle


  • Aristotle

    Get in the hole!!!

  • mvpitzki

    Damn i thought the rim was shorter. Get Over Here!

  • humous


  • Glendon Wilson

    Maybe if I break this backboard with the ball and make it look accidental, I can make the Bulls spend enough on repairs to keep them from signing Dwyane Wade..

  • vincent

    use the force!

  • humous

    Gross! I am long overdue for a manicure.

  • donte leverett

    “oops i did it again”
    thats a “joakim no no”

  • Davari Miller

    ZIM!!! ZIM!!! ZALA BIM

    dad taught me to serve over the net


  • beeper

    my hand is my gun
    the ball is my bullet

  • http://slamonline.com Jonathan Helmick

    Joakim Noah thought he was Spider-man but he simply ran out of web.

  • Brian

    Ah damn i forgot about the rim

  • http://slamonline.com RayintheBay

    Damn kid, he has the same form as JaMarcus Russell

  • http://facebook.com Stephanie Wagner

    Hey guys I can use the force to shoot the ball!

  • kash6

    oh damn, i just crapped myself again ):

  • kash6

    this is for you shawn marion!

  • kash6

    i dont recall the last time i took a shower…blah

  • Dan Ilika

    “Hey, Gil, I know life’s a little hectic right now, but where’s my money?”

  • Hotshot

    Noah “to be or not be that is the question, and the answer IS a misfortune. IS Chris going to block my shot.”

  • SeanJaye88

    “Basket Ball powers, ACTIVATE!”

  • Daniel

    This shot is dedicated to Shawn Marion and the animals saved by my ark.

  • The Sweetness

    Yo, Bosh, check out my patented Finger Drool.

  • http://myspace.com/icue08 brandon sommers

    “Can you guys tell I’ve been working on my game?” (he’s actually becoming a better ofensive player)

  • J.D. Maynard

    “Go web, go!
    Fly web!
    Up, up, and away web!”

  • Taylor Hackett

    Like my team, i have limped wrist’s and cant do anything right.

  • J. Maier

    Jump Shot, Granny Shot, Hook Shot… this is the Skee Ball shot fool!

  • Lisa

    Look out for that poster in participating stores only!

  • Dylan Smith

    Joakim: Go poke ball Go!
    Calderon:Oh-No! Its a pikachu!

  • Matt Mich

    Noah: Free throw line dunk failed, maybe if I throw it up and and change my form it’ll look like I got fouled…but no one’s around me…guess I have to use the force now, Star Wars don’t fail me now.
    Calderon: He’s using the Force…can he actually do it?

  • Justin Brown

    We all knew Joakim Noah looked like a caveman, we just didn’t know he shot like one too.

  • http://june7thdonald@netzero.net donlaker

    im glad i have this invisible string attached to the ball,the refs won’t suspect a thing…

  • http://june7thdonald@netzero.net donlaker

    coach said a lob to my self…..

  • http://june7thdonald@netzero.net donlaker

    my levitation trick worked on the ball also…

  • goodfoot

    Where’s Noah’s ark?

  • Delonny

    Noah is Krillin from Dargonball Z throwin a destructo-disk at the basket…ahhhhhhhhhhhhh

  • Dakid

    Friends or Teammates I should say lend me your power, as I throw this spirit bomb…spirit bomb activate……AAAHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (dragonballz)

  • Delonny

    Noah is Krillin from Dragonball Z- Destructo-disk away….destroy the rimmmmm….ahhhahahhhhhhhh

  • marcus

    Derozan – ” damn if he was on my team, i would get some serious put backs”

  • Dylan Smith

    Go Poke ball!

  • http://slamonline.com/ Ryne Nelson

    Thanks every for your submissions. The winner will be announced in the Trash Talk section of Ish 136. Pick the issue up on newsstands in early February.