Thursday, May 13th, 2010 at 12:09 pm  |  162 responses

Sure Shot

They say a picture’s worth 1,000 words. But you only need a couple to win.

RaptorsMost disappointing season in the League? No argument if you choose the Raptors. How bad was it? We have our own ideas, but it’s always fun to let you guys do some work once in a while. So, as always, please submit your caption to this pic.

Whoever writes the funniest caption will win a dope prize from our vault and see their name in Trash Talk next issue.

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  • http://www.twitter.com/dillanstraight DIllan Straight

    Welcome to Oklahoma City Bosh!

  • Richard Bauer

    “If a NBA team plays in Toronto, does anyone actually know?”

  • http://i9.photobucket.com/albums/a78/nursetpd/TSB/Danny_Ainge_Shamwow.gif ENDS

    turk: I shoulda gone to portland

    Everyone else: Damn he shoulda gone to Portland

  • Ben

    I think they should make an espn website for the raptors: ESPNembarrassment.com

  • Cindog

    Turkoglu: 2009 NBA finals to this? Oh well.. At least I’ll be the highest paid player for these suckers for the next couple of years.

  • themis

    The Daltons Strike Back.(Amir is Averell)

  • Ben

    Jarrett Jack: Gotta wake up, I gotta wake up

  • alexzografou

    Hedo:I could really go for some pizza…

  • k

    “Maybe if I throw a towel over my head and do exactly what Calderon is doing, they won’t know which of us is stealing paychecks”

  • http://www.slamonline.com/ niQ

    Hedo: Hey guys, anyone want to go for some Pizza and Sprite after this game?… Guys?
    Jack: *facepalm*

  • http://www.slamonline.com/ niQ

    Hedo: Hey guys, anyone want to go for some Pizza and Sprite after this game?… Guys?
    Jack: *facepalm*

  • cheeks21

    Hedo: hmmm pizza and sprite
    JJ to JC: ur fault
    JC to JJ: comprende amigo

  • chase

    well at least the groupies are still paying attention.

  • Scott

    Hedo: *mutters Turkish profanities*
    Jose: *quietly curses Bargnani in Spanish*
    Jarrett: “I hope Colangelo trades me away from here for another f@&$ing European”
    Amir: “I can’t wait til I get Bosh’s playing time once he leaves”

  • http://www.nba.com olive_akiko

    Hedo: “Look, Bosh is sitting with Mike D’Antoni! We’re getting a new coach!”

  • Darren

    No wonder Chris’ twitter stream is more popular than our team

  • Ivan

    Three Not-so-Wise Monkeys “See no defense, hear no defense, speak no defense.”

  • Josh

    “Wait, you paid us to try to win? Oops.”

  • tmw554

    “NBA action: its fantastic”

  • Tim

    Hedo: “I miss Dwight”
    Everybody else: “We’ll miss you Chris”

  • http://www.anwilson.blogspot.com rainman10

    *Looking at Vince Carter*–”We could really use his defensive intensity.”

  • http://www.anwilson.blogspot.com rainman10

    Turk: “At least we’re the best team in Canada.”

    Calderon: “The Grizzlies are better than us.”

    Jarrett Jack: “…”

  • Jose

    It was then that the Raptors realized Bosh wasn’t really coming back with pizza…

  • Shem

    It was tough reading through this comment box.. SLAM basically put a take your shot at the RAPS article.

  • http://www.sonicbids.com doyouwantmore

    Everybody hates Chris

  • http://www.sonicbids.com doyouwantmore

    The Toronto Raptors execute a flawless iso play designed for Chris Bosh.

  • http://www.twitter.com/notebooknick NotebookNick

    Clearly, Hedo is musing about his Pizza Pizza and Sprite.

  • http://www.anwilson.blogspot.com rainman10

    “why do Chris and Andrea insist on doing this halftime show every game?”

  • a_whiteman

    turk-how am i suppose to get ball more over here
    jose-coach said i can play if i learn defence, but i dont hear anyone else speaking it!
    jack-why couldnt indiana offer me 20 mill
    amir-what the hell is a belinelli

  • Taranvir

    Even Superfan Nav Bhatia couldn’t fix this

  • http://thetroyblog.com Teddy-the-Bear

    Hedo Turkoglu: “I finally suited up tonight to watch Chris and Andrea shooting MY jumpers!?”

  • http://slamonline.com Brad Long

    Jarret Jack:Holly McKenzie is going to be sooo disappointed in us.

  • salty

    Hedo: i feel ridiculus for wearing my volleyball knee pads

  • mAMba

    Hedo – Why isnt there any pizza at the night clubs?
    Jose – *whispering* You shoulda gone to Portland if u wanted that
    Jack – I miss you so much Troy Murphy
    Amir – OMG did Bosh really ask for a tweet break?

  • David

    Drawing upon his wealth of experience and oh-so-versatile game, Hedo leads by example.

  • http://itsgotabethethunderanlakersseries.anwhenrusselwestbrooksmashedonlamarodem cup

    hedo: you here chris leavin next year? jarret: damn there go half our points

  • Zarfan

    Jarrett: Let’s just drink and forget today.
    Jose: Alcohol is banned in the fourth quarter.
    Hedo: I’m pretty sure they still sell pizza.
    Amir: Yeah. You’ve mentioned that. A couple times. Every game.

  • Zarfan

    They’re not actually on the bench. They’re just playing defense.

  • D12FSU

    2010-11 Toronto Raptors. ‘Not pictured: Chris Bosh’

  • http://thetroyblog.com Teddy-the-Bear

    LMAO @ Zarfan! hahaha

  • http://Slamonline.com Brandon Moore

    Hedo: Think Chris will stay?
    Jarret: Think we’ll win this game?
    Hedo: Touche.

  • http://Slamonline.com Brandon Moore

    Hedo: Think Chris will stay?
    Jarret: Think we’ll win this game?
    Hedo: Touche.

  • waell

    raptors: will we every get rings??

  • waell

    hedo:i would of liked portland better than this
    jarret:were chopped and screwed
    toronto:we’ll miss you chris
    chris: but i wont!!

  • amrit

    Hedo: “Man im sick of this, i rather be out at a club!”

  • http://www.nba.com/suns Dacre

    Speak no English (x2), See No Defense, Hear no coach…

  • Sami Adnan

    Yin and Yang the the black shirts on the right are the best defenders on the team while the the white shirts to the right are the two worst defensive players on the team.

  • benny

    jarrett: my hand looks better than us!

  • got beef?

    Jarret Jack: once again, they all watchin the offensive tapes, do they even know what Defense is?

  • PlanetAsia14

    Hedo: *Sighs* Well guys, look at it this way; at least our bench production is going up…

    Jose: Hedo, did you really just say that?

    Jarrett: *Covers his head in shame, whimpers* Why God, why?

    Amir: *Mumbles under his breath* Not with Chris in.

  • PlanetAsia14

    Hedo: *Sighs* Well guys, look at it this way; at least our bench production is going up…

    Jose: Hedo, did you really just say that?

    Jarrett: *Covers his head in shame, whimpers* Why God, why?

    Amir: *Mumbles under his breath* Not with Chris in.

  • http://bugshots.info LeoneL

    This photo is not even worth a thousand words.

  • Scottie Pimpin

    raptors the true b ball warriors they are try to battle out a win with hangovers

  • sample

    no more late party drinkin’ before the game guys

  • Diego

    Jose- You guys think we have a chance next year?
    Hedo-Do you think the timberwolves have a chance next year?

  • bswagelokus

    “Yeah, my heads throbbin too…. Hedo, you gotta listen to the bartender when they say ‘last call’ next time. Its a good thing there were no college girls around though.”

  • bswagelokus

    Man whenever i look at Bosh, i keep thinkin im back at the movies, watchin Avatar in 3D.

  • http://greensweet259@gmail.com Daniel Segura

    jack:so what do we do now hedo??
    hedo:lets go out for some pizza because after big man bosh leaves this will never happen again!

  • BostonBaller

    We stunk but at least we didn’t get exposed like the Cavs.

  • Balherett3

    Hedo:Maybe it wouldn’t have been that bad to go to the Clippers. At least they can get a lottery pick and create false hope all over again.

  • http://facebook.com/dudleylucien Dudley L.

    Yeah…we suck

  • hillbilly

    PA (blaring): “…Inforrrrrrrr-mer, ya’ no say daddy me Snow me I’ll go blayyyyy-um…a licky boom boom dowwwwwn…”

  • Ashley

    Hedo: “I wish I were back with Orlando.”

  • Aviel Shirian

    Hedo Turkoglu: who cares if we lose lets go hit the clubs in T.O and Party!

  • Jacob Menhinick

    “If we are here, who is out there…turning the ball over?”

  • Chris Taylor

    Hedo: “I love you, you love me..”
    Jose: (beat boxing)
    Jack: “I shoulda known going to a team with a giant purple dinosaur as a mascot would be career suicide…”

  • Reshawn Dixon

    Hedo: damn we suck i wonder what clubs are open tonight?
    Jose: i hope this coach gets fired
    Jack: damn we suck and i still dont get playing time…does that mean im garbage?

  • Grant Marlowe

    Calderon to Jack “Bosh is coming back next year, right? Right?”

  • trout

    Hedo: Damn, shoulda gone to Portland
    Jack: I heard that, shoulda stayed in Portland
    Jose: Como?

  • Aristotle

    The Feeling of Extinction

  • Marty Rendon

    Hedo: I wonder what Dwight is doing?
    Calderon: Those nachos look good.
    Jack: Hey guys, if you rub your eyes really hard you can see stars..

  • twahc

    All thinking,

    Don’t put me back in the game!

  • Dylan

    Hedo: “I must’ve left my Magic in Orlando.”
    Jarrett: “I hope no one smells that.”
    Jose: “Man, Hedo needs to shower.”

  • Mark Rosa

    Jose: Psst…Jarrett. Look, Hedo’s not wearing any shorts.
    Jarrett: I don’t want to look!

  • retep

    hedo: thanx for the cash and the contract raps! yall just got Hedont Turkuglued! Now im stuck with yah for years!
    jack: at least bosh finally gets free from this…

  • http://Slamonline Spencer Swisher

    All thinking “What? You mean we’re not making the playoffs”

  • Todd Benevento

    Everybody misses chris!

  • Nick

    Jose Calderon: I know, getting Turk was a bad move…but I ain’t telling him that…

  • Noah Stuart

    Oh Shenanigans!

  • Zach C.

    Jarrett Jack: I cant believe that there are TWO white guys on our bench.
    Amir Johnson: Just dont look at them.

  • Whorelando

    Raptors: “Oh I hate to think what they will write about us in SLAM!”

  • Clarice

    Turk: Oh look, they’re advertising a club over there …

    Jose: Thanks a lot Turk… You’re partying got me & Jarrett here benched.

    Jarrett: *facepalm*

  • Clarice

    Amir: Hey Guys, look my right thumb just beat my left thumb, in a thumb wrestling match.

    Jarrett Jack: *facepalm*

    Jose: Why dont you bring some of that magic Amir, into this game for BALLman over here ?

    Hedo: Gawsh. Stop blaming me already. Portland is already laughing at my face, so hush.

  • Clarice

    Lmao rainman10 ..

  • Arabelle

    Hedo: CB said he’s thinking of taking me to wherever he goes next season…

    Jose: Well that’s good for you, but you have a contract here … for a long… long time.

    Amir: I just beat my left thumb in this wrestling match, look !

    Jarrett: *facepalm*

  • robert stewart

    Jarret Jack “Out of sight, out of mind”

  • http://slamonline BossTerry

    Jose- Dont worry Jarrett, even if Bosh leaves this summer, Hedo and I will still be here for ya.

  • Jonny

    this is like watching Kazaam 82 times

    at least Demar Derozan repped us well in the dunk contest . . . by well I mean . . . accurately

  • DePaul

    Mt. “Bosh”more (The Raptors version of Mt. Rushmore)

  • http://www.kwapt.blogspot.com KobeWearsAPurpleThong

    Jack: “There’s no place like home, there’s no place like home..”

    Hedo: ” You have to click your heels together too JJ.”

    Johnson:”Oh oh..can I be the Tin Man?”

    Calderon:”I’m gonna crank-call KG all f***ing summer long..”

  • http://P.OBox67NORRISSD57560 LOREN GS

    aww man did you see him get dunked on it looked like a lebron dunk

  • Zarfan

    Sometimes, cold weather is an okay excuse for “Flu-Like Symptoms.”

  • Tye 5

    Damn Hedo, again why did you leave Orlando?

  • Niko Skeriotis

    Hedo,Johnson,Calderon: Oh Man you see that girl over there?

    Jack: No, no man. I can’t look. I just can’t.

  • Christopher Thomas

    Hedo- You going to see the new Twilight Movie
    Caldron- Hmmmm
    Jarret Jack- I need a Drink
    Johnson- Does this mean i get to play

  • Chris Smith

    Hedo – Hear no defense
    Jose – Speak no defense
    JJ – Just don’t wanna look…..

  • Danny Farrell

    Damnnnnn….. We shouldn’t of split those bottles of patron last night

  • Shaun McDonald

    This pic looks like Da Vinci’s “Last Supper” except Jesus refused to show up because he didn’t think he could help the Raptors out.
    Jack to Jesus: “Please trade these guys Lord. I’d even take Judas (cough)… I mean, Vince back.”
    Jesus to Jack: “I’m still stuck in Indiana trying to clean up the first mess you were in. I’ll ttyl. Peace.”

  • James

    Hedo: ‘Hey Andrea, Amir. We your new gals.’
    Jarrett: ‘Look guys I didn’t want to do it’

  • Mykah Horrell

    Hedo:Hey Jarret What’s Wrong With You.
    Jarret:Losing To The Pistons Was Bad Enough But Now The Nets.

  • Golden

    “Hear No Wins, Speak No Wins, See No Wins, Gets No Wins”

  • karley and kourtney

    hedo: whose feet do i smell
    Jose:aww sorrythose minutes of playing time really got to my feet
    Jerret: aww man come on! you got to get rid of that stench

  • william nuilan

    Jose, Hedu, and Amir ” it’s ok jack, we had a good run..

    ( Jack ) ” No, i’m good. My hand just smells good.

  • http://Slam Jasmine

    “Hey at least we made it to the NBA”. Right???

  • Joe Welsh

    Oh great… now wear as bad as the Nets….

  • Balherett3

    Jack: Man,I thinks it’s time we start signing hockey players for toughness.

  • Fishnet

    Hedo: Adam, biz emmek…
    Jose: El hombre, que chupan…
    Whoever’s covering his own face: I never know what those guys are saying. Man, we suck…

  • Money Dhillon

    Jack-Aww man theres something stuck in Bosh’s hair isn’t there

  • http://slamonline.com JROSALAN

    Hedo: Aw hells no. They comparin me to Vujacic
    Jose: Ay caramba…
    Jarret: Oh My Bosh :(
    Amir: Well that was a fun season…

  • matt

    the raptors got a serviceable bench!

  • Chase Lochamire

    Hedo: Hey, it could be worse. We could be the only non-American NBA team and we could have narrowly missed the playoffs or our best player could become a free agent at the end of the season. At least I didn’t choose this place over a title contending team like, say, the Magic. It could be worse.

  • Kevin Long

    Jose: Oh Rasho… Not another Three!

  • Kevin Long

    With Hedo, Jack and Calderon on the bench, that gives the raptors all star point guard some time to step up.

    Get up for Marcus Banks!

  • matt

    hedo: isitmek hic defans
    jose: no hable ninguna defensa
    jarret: see no defense

  • WasAt

    hedo:thank god my girlfreind aint dominatingme

  • WasAt

    hedo:thank god my girlfriend aint dominating me

  • Lou

    (jose) crap u see the score in the leafs game?

  • Ali Saadat

    *Thinking together* “Damn I can’t believe Bargnani missed another dunk”

  • Peggy

    Hedo: Hear no evil
    J.J.: Speak no evil
    Jose: oh man I just can’t watch anymore. wake me when it’s over.

  • MG28

    It’s not our fault! It’s this canadien hardwood! It’s maple….

  • Daniel

    Turk: “Ball”
    Jose: Dude, what are you talking about?
    Turk: “Ball”

  • Tony H.

    “You can try to run, but you can’t hide, Jack !!!”

  • http://LemuelJames P.O BOX 724 Wallace, NC

    Hedo: Man i wish i stayed in Orlando
    Jarret: i hope bosh demands a sign and trade and get me out of here.
    Amir: hey turk does the best free agency class start in a couple of months.
    Hedo: Dont remind me im here on this crappy team for years to come.

  • Lemuel.James

    Hedo: Man i wish i stayed in Orlando
    Jarret: i hope bosh demands a sign and trade and get me out of here.
    Amir: hey turk does the best free agency class start in a couple of months.
    Hedo: Dont remind me im here on this crappy team for years to come

  • Jordan Zimmerman

    “Well at least we still have the great weather”

  • http://live.ca Will Fiander

    Is it over yet?

  • http://hotmail.com joseph fiander

    i wish we still Vince Carter

  • http://hotmail.com joseph fiander

    i wish we still Vince Carter T-Mac

  • http://hotmail.com joseph fiander

    Wake me up when it’s over

  • http://youtube.com/tayo365 Taiyo


  • DJ

    Jarret Jack wakes up: Are we still getting blown out?

    Everyone simultaneously says: yes… its another repeat of the hawks game

  • Alex z


  • Alex z

    Jarret: maybe if I hide my face I’ll be mistaken for Vince Carter….

  • Paddy

    The NBA: Where Bryan Colangelo wins Executive of the Year two times happens

  • Cain

    Amir: We couldn’t do it….
    Jose: It’s ok. We’ll make the Playoffs next year.
    Amir: Playoffs? I was trying to impress the ladies behind us.
    Jack: Aw Man, you going down!

  • http://@MrRavi_PorVida(Twitter) Ravi

    As the Raptors collectively think, “Do you think our team will be hot next season if we get Drake on the remix?”

  • BrandoCommando

    Hedo: Mmmmmmm pizza and sprite…
    Jose: I hope I start next year…
    Amir: Why is Bargnani on right now?
    Jarrett: This is just a dream, a bad, bad dream…

  • Brendan Wills

    Amir- i dont get no playing time man im a bum.
    Jarret- I cant believe this S**t
    Jose- Me either!
    Hedo- I know i signed to try and get the raptors to the playoffs and now were losing to the nets!

  • Kyle S

    Amir: Come on Chris! Just 1 more push up!!

    Jarret: I can watch this any more…

    Jose: I think i just won my bet.. Reggie! wheres my money?!

    Hedo: I wonder how much those nacho’s are…

  • Cody Masden

    Hedo: Is that Chris peeing on the raptors logo?
    Jose: Oh my gosh it is! Jarett look
    Jarett: Im not looking, you cant make me!

  • Cody Masden

    hedo: is that Chris peeing on the raptors logo?
    Jose: oh my gosh it is! Jarret look
    Jarett: Im not looking you cant make me
    Amir: Oh thats foul

  • Phil S

    Amir:”I knew.”
    Jarett:”Why am I just NOW hearing about this?!?”
    Jose: “The pay is now similiar…”
    Hedo:”…and we would’ve won three Euroleague titles by now.”

  • John Blyskis

    The Toronto Raptors: Where Embarrassment Happens

  • Scott Jandreau

    i forgot to tell them when i sighnd that big deal i dont play D and i love riden the Bench

  • JayChau

    “We’re just rehearsing how we should look when Bosh plays against us in another uniform. No big deal.”

  • Bryan Leung


  • http://theofanos3211523Athens,Greece John Villanueva

    “Toronto Raptors sucks”

  • Darryl White

    Tukogolo: Why couldn’t I stay with Orlando?
    Calderon: Why couldn’t we have won the Gold Medal?
    Jack: Where is Chris signing so I know where to put my stuff at?
    Johnson: When is this game over?

  • Ray


  • Dresus

    Hear no evil, Speak no evil, See no evil, and that’s a Rap!

  • Lucas Young

    Calderon to Jack: Man Hedo was one of the worst signs ever! He is soooo bad!
    Jack to Calderon: Dude hes right there (hand to face)

  • Joseph Wahba

    Jose to Jack: dude, how much is he getting paid?
    Jack to Jose: starts with 50 ends in million.
    Amir: and he’s white.
    Turkoglu: money, money, money…monaaay, and I’m white!

  • Caleb

    Turk:I knew I should’ve stayed with the Magic.Jack: Stop whining Free agency will be here to save us all.

  • Joseph Wahba

    Jose: damn man we suck!
    Amir: u just noticed?
    Jose: what r we doing wrong?
    Hedo: uhh…ball?!
    Jack: Oh cmon!…*palmtoface*

  • Zarfan

    Hedo: Ball!
    Jose: I know. It just disappears when we’re on defense.
    Jarrett: Like a solar eclipse.
    Amir: Only less common.

  • http://kraintz@uoregon.edu Stew Kraintz

    Hedo: What pick did we get?
    Jose: 13th.
    Hedo: You think we could get Derrick Favors, Greg Monroe, or DeMarcus Cousins to replace Chris?
    Jose: No… think more like Cole Aldrich.
    Jack: Crap.

  • Jordan Turner


  • Sherif

    Calderon (in Spanish): “When will i get a chance to play in the NBA?? I’ve been in the Euro League for too long”
    Hedo (in Turkish): “OK so….i was on a Championship team, then what happened?!”
    Amir: “Why doesn’t the MC Chicken get the credit it deserves, it’s always Big Mac this, Big Mac that”
    Jack: “This is too much for me!! I can’t take it anymore!!”

  • Gino S.

    Hedo: Man i shoulda’ve stayed in Orlando, (sighs) Oh well.
    Calderon: Yo Jack hedo’s sayin he shoulda’ve stayed in orlando, where is that?
    Jack: Man i don’t care can’t you see im said that indiana threw me out here?
    Amir: (in his head) When do i get to play, when do i get to play, when do i get to play?

  • http://SlamOnline Camm518

    Raptors:I guess we can ask to get on the please stay a toronto raptor remix with that chick…

  • http://slamonline.com Ben Osborne

    Thanks for all the entries. The winner will be announced in SLAM 140, on sale next week.