L.O.N. — The Irrelevant Kevin Love
Tyrone Nesby knows what it is.
by Shannon Booher / @TheRealSJB
Line Of The Night:
Kevin Love — 31 points, 31 boards, 5 assists, 1 block
Who cares? What about the Heat? Sorry, that’s what goes down with the TWolves and the Knicks. It might be fun, but it ain’t important.
Michael And Scottie Volume II Of The Night:
Get your shots in now. This is Michael and Scottie Volume II. Who cares what Bosh does? He’ll either buy himself a set of goggles and Horace Grant it, die his hair and Rodman it, or Charles Oakley it and get traded away. Doesn’t matter. These cats are nine games in. The Breakfast Club has not been established. Get your shots on now, Yahoo dude. Get your shots in now, Twitter. Because give it 20? 30? hell, maybe 120? And IT’S OVER. Word to Kenny and Vince. GET. YOUR. SHOTS. IN. NOW. ‘Cause it’s easy now… but then you’ll need to hide your kids, hide your wife.
Near Beast Of The Night:
Blake Griffin — 18 points, 18 boards, 4 assists, 2 blocks, 1 steal
Loss. We are not sure if he is a culture changer… those are hard to come by, and the Clippers culture is a hard one to right.
Cancer Of The Night:
Charlie Villanueva — 30 points, 1 board, 1 assist, 1 steal
Love ya like a play cousin, Charlie, but tweet-snitching ain’t cool. We respect your plight, but KG won. He doesn’t make it personal, but you did, and that explains everything. Keep it moving, and keep balling on the Clippers. Call us when your GM gets a clue and you can beat teams that AREN’T the worst franchises in sports.
Regrets Of The Night:
Vince Carter — 10 points, 4 boards, 3 assists, 2 steals
Orlando lost to Toronto at home. Y’all are telling us it is not a plausible scenario that Vince feels bad about the whole Toronto thing, and he didn’t throw this game? We are whispering so Dean can’t hear us, but you know it’s in play.
Maybe You Are Feeling Yourself… Just A Little Too Much:
Russell Westbrook — 36 points, 7 assists, 7 boards, 3 steals, 2 blocks
Yes, you ended it. Game-closer, cuffed the lay-up, even. But look to your left. THAT’s that dude. His name is Kevin. He’s too respectful to take your shine, but it’s his team. Calm down. Let the game come to you. You don’t want to Kobe/Shaq this thing, do you?
Tyrone Nesby, Keon Clark, Kevin Gaines and Brandon Smith. And we’re out.