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Thursday, March 1st, 2012 at 12:40 pm  |  76 responses

Barack Obama Guarantees a Chicago Bulls Championship


According to President Obama, he will welcome the Chicago Bulls as world champs into the White House before he leaves office. From Grantland: “BS: Over the last five years, how many times have you envisioned welcoming the world champion Chicago Bulls to the White House? Obama: ‘Every year. And it hasn’t happened yet, but it will happen. BS: It will happen? You’re like Joe Namath — you’re guaranteeing it. Obama: ‘Well, I’ve got another five years here and — [laughter] —’ BS: You’re guaranteeing that, too. [Laughter.] Obama: — ‘somewhere along the line my Bulls are going to come through here. Absolutely.’ BS: You’ll probably cry. You’ll well up a little bit. Obama: ‘I probably won’t do the whole Jordan-hugging-the-ball thing.’ BS: Right. Him lying on the ground. [Laughter.] Obama: ‘That would be a little extreme. I’ll be pretty happy, though.”

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  • http://slamonline.com nbk

    and a second term in the white house.

  • http://www.slamonline.com Slick Ric

    True fan, how else should he feel? here comes the haters though unfortunately.

  • Kyle in VA

    In the same interview, he also set the expectation for an 8 team bcs playoff. The man has some very rational thoughts on sports

  • http://www.michaelcho.com M Cho

    Agreed – a true Bulls fan. And before the haters start up — Obama can’t answer every question from the media with “Sorry, I have to concentrate on the economy.”

  • Mike

    Hahah Obama is gonna have Lebron dwade Durant and Westbrook injured in the playoffs, that’s how the bulls will get to the white house

  • http://slamonline.com The Philosopher

    Shout out to the Illuminati.

  • http://nyill.wordpress.com Enigmatic

    If the Bulls lose to the Heat again, Obama’s sending SEAL Team 6 to Mickey Arison and Pat Riley’s houses.
    Don’t worry, he’ll just have them roughed up a bit.
    And if he’s REALLY a Bulls fan…he might send them out to Boozer’s house too. He conveniently also lives in Miami.

  • http://slamonline.com LakeShow

    Here comes the haters to hate on Obama!……. *crickets*

  • Rainman

    Shout out to the Freemasons.

  • bike

    They should have asked him what he thought the Wizard’s chances are. C’mon, Barack, being the prez and all, how about showing a little mojo for DC?

  • http://nyill.wordpress.com/ O

    Obama’s seems like the only President in recent history who wasn’t in a secret society. That’s probably why Republicans give him such a hard time. That and because he’s black. Anyway, this doesn’t put ANY pressure or a target on the Bulls in the playoffs…

  • http://slamonline.com LakeShow

    O, don’t forget the policy’s that he stands for are against most republicans ideals. Republicans didn’t like Bill Clinton. Nor did they like Jimmy Carter. Those dudes weren’t very black. I’m sure some racist Republicans don’t like him because of his skin color, but do you think racist Democrats like him? Probably not, us they are racist. It’s silly to say that Republicans don’t like Obama because he wasn’t in a secret society and is black. ‘People’ who are racist don’t like Obama. Not ‘Republicans’. That’s just a false and dumb blanket statement.

  • http://slamonline.com LakeShow

    One more thing… Do you think that former President Bush was given a “hard time” by Democrats because of his skin color? I’m going to go with no. I think they were firmly against his policy’s not the color of his skin. Food for thought.

  • http://slamonline.com The Philosopher

    Shout out to the Baphomet…

  • Aizen

    Of course the President guarantees a Bulls championship…’cause he’s a fan. Duh.

    Nothing to see here…

  • http://slamonline.com The Philosopher

    Oh, and every president in the History of the United States of America only do what their “bosses” tell them to do.
    That is all that they are allowed to do.
    Shout out to Bohemian Grove.

  • http://thetroyblog.com Teddy-the-Bear

    Just like he “guaranteed” he would end the wars…

  • http://thetroyblog.com Teddy-the-Bear

    Republicans don’t hate Obama because of his policies. They hate him because he is a Democrat. His policies are very much in line with both Bushes; there literally is no difference whatsoever between them except that Obama is a better, more charismatic speaker.

  • http://thetroyblog.com Teddy-the-Bear

    LakeShow aren’t you a Ron Paulian? Unfortunately Ron Paul is hated by 99.9% of the Republican party (the politicans, anyway). Voters love him though, and rightfully so. He’s a bad @ss.

  • http://slamonline.com The Philosopher

    He can’t end the wars.
    Even if he wanted to.

  • http://slamonline.com LakeShow

    Huge Ron Paul supporter. I agree with you some-what on what you said about them hating him because he is a Democrat. Your right that his policy’s are not to far from Republican’s, but we all know he is very liberal. The republican house of representatives does not let him be as liberal as he wants to be. If he had things his way things would be allot different right now, but he can’t implement the policy’s that he wants to. It’s so stupid that Repub’s are not more enamored by Sir Paul. He is amazing.

  • Rainman

    Shout out to all seeing eye

  • Rainman

    and shout out to the pyramid. both on the american dollar

  • http://slamonline.com nbk

    shout out to agendas. and the denial of them.

  • http://slamonline.com The Philosopher

    Shout out to the Club of Rome.

  • http://slamonline.com nbk

    Shout Out to the Club of Budapest and Club of Madrid.

  • Rainman

    Shout out to NATO.

  • http://www.slamonline.com Nick Tha Quick

    Shout out to no contraception. Let NBA player seed fill the earth.

  • http://slamonline.com LakeShow

    Shout, shout, let it all out, these are the things I can do without
    Come on, I’m talking to you, come on
    Shout, shout, let it all out, these are the things I can do without.

  • Rainman

    Shout out to LakeShow.

  • http://slamonline.com The Philosopher

    “If I could change your mind…
    I really want to break your heart…”

  • bike

    Shout out to all the Impetuous Libertines.

  • http://slamonline.com The Philosopher

    Shout out to The Rothschilds…

  • http://slamonline.com nbk

    “Give me control of a nation’s money and I care not who makes her laws.” -Mayer Amschel Rothschild.

  • Rainman

    Shout out to the Rockefellers.

  • bike

    “NBA players make a lot of money, but they also spend a lot of money.” -Patrick Ewing

  • http://slamonline.com The Philosopher

    Shout out to the DuPonts.
    Shout out to the Bush family, whose real surname is Busche…
    Who aided Hitler during WWII…

  • Rainman

    Shout to “Osama” and “Al-Qaeda”

  • Rainman

    and Shout out to who aided them

  • http://slamonline.com The Philosopher

    Shout out to Al-Qaeda really being the Central Intelligence Agency.

  • http://Slamonline.com nbk

    Shout Out to whoever made my shoes. These sh*ts are comfy

  • Rainman

    Shout out to where the aid the “rebels” in syria and libya have who have Strong ties to this “Al-Qaeda” we speak of, comes from.

  • http://slamonline.com The Philosopher

    Who owns everything in the Holy City of Mecca?
    The Bin Ladens??
    Oh.

  • http://Slamonline.com nbk

    Shout out to Albert Kata for being unlucky.

  • Rainman

    Shout out to the Saud family, and all that goes on in their palaces.

  • http://vigilantcitizen.com WBB

    Shoutout@ the Philosopher and Rainman for dropping knowledge.
    Shoutout to the Van Duyns

  • http://www.nba.com Red

    Shout out to Rick Santorum 2012, or just 2012. And hey hey y’all not gonna send shots at the holy city!! Lol

  • Rainman

    Im muslim, no shots at the holy city lol, just the ppl that run it..

  • Rainman

    Oh, and Shout out to Barber Rainman, i done trimmed my beard nicely.

  • LA Huey

    Shout out to MewTwo

  • http://www.fiba.com Darksaber

    Man that’s unorthodox campaigning.
    How the hell did Bill Simmons set this up?
    Impressive coup.

  • blakos

    Shout out to USA’s Imperialistic foreign policy

  • blakos

    Shout out to US Society’s super anvanced and corporate version of patronage

  • http://www.facebook.com/joe.l.brewer3 BlackPhantom

    Shoutout to George W. Bush probably being Alestier Crowley’s grandson…

  • http://www.facebook.com/joe.l.brewer3 BlackPhantom

    Shoutout to the “mad prophet of the airwaves” Howard Beale.

  • http://www.facebook.com/joe.l.brewer3 BlackPhantom

    Yeah I know Howard Beale’s only a character- I don’t care, that movie was so far ahead of it’s time.

  • http://www.tampax.com DYWM

    “If this economy hasn’t turned around in four years, it’s on me.” – Barack Obama, 2008

  • http://www.nba.com Red

    This might be my favorite thread, ain’t nobody arguing, say whaaaat.

  • IamYou

    Obama we comin fo you N*gga!

  • http://www.slamonline.com spit hot fiyah

    shoutout to alex jones

  • http://www.yahoo.com The Fury

    Shout out to Slamily for these wise comments

  • http://slamonline.com samoaninlondon

    shout out to the bilderberg committee

  • Yesse

    I dont think this is helping him getting re-elected.

    What this has to do with politics anyway?

  • KidCongo

    Shout out to Mulder

  • http://slamonline.com datkid

    ugh I hate all of you lol. lakeshow, don’t be silly republicans DEFINITELY hate obama more bc he’s black. There’s no question. and it’s not personal but F*CK Ron Paul and his racist @ss newspaper…. also I’d like to thank teddy for not going on an anti-american rant again.

  • Guest

    how about you Guarantee more jobs for our country. How about you Guarantee bringing back our troops in iraq/afghanistan home. Everything that comes out your mouth is garbage. Vote RON PAUL. That mans the Truth.

  • http://slamonline.com nbk

    if you like your presidents with two first names

  • charliewinning

    Shout out to Ron Paul’s ideas on American foreign policy. F his racist rants and presidential bid.

  • http://slamonline.com LakeShow

    datkid, You sound incredibly stupid when you use blanket statements like that. You sound like an absolute fool. My parents are Republicans and they aren’t racist so you are immediately found wrong about that. It sounds incredibly ignorant to place 40% of Americans voters as racist. Again I ask, were those same people being racist when they wanted Bill Clinton impeached? Thank you, thank you, and I bid you adieu.

  • EJ

    Obama very liberal?? lmao
    And “Ron Paul’s racist @ss newspapers” weren’t really his. He had no idea somebody was publishing them, and I believe him. He’s pretty much the only republican who has not said anything racist during their campaign, as far as I know.

  • http://thetroyblog.com Teddy-the-Bear

    Technically, every American president is racist because they support the War on Drugs and the federal death penalty, which are both fundamentally racist. Ron Paul is the only candidate who will end the War on Drugs.
    He’s also the only candidate who doesn’t want to invade Iran and spark World War III.

  • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F4DgcYc0jJw EJ

    Click my name. I think people should take this more into consideration when Ron Paul and the war on drugs are being discussed.

  • http://thetroyblog.com Teddy-the-Bear

    @ EJ: No offense, but that video is complete nonsense. The guy in the video has zero idea of what he’s talking about.
    First of all, Ron Paul has never said he would cut welfare and social programs immediately. Most of his cuts (unlike EVERY other US president of the past century) would come out of the military budget, and that would be enough to kick-start the economy. He is a libertarian but he has also said, very clearly, that libertarianism does not work until people have the means to support themselves. That means he would NOT cut medicaid or welfare until the economy was back on track and businesses were employing people.
    Furthermore, the amount of money it costs tax payers to house these convicts far exceeds the amount of money it costs to give people social aid. If it’s between providing people with social aid where they can contribute to society and providing people with basic means to survive in cages, which makes the most sense? And that’s just the economic argument.

  • http://thetroyblog.com Teddy-the-Bear

    The idea that we shouldn’t release non-violent drug offenders, most of them having been imprisoned via racial discrimination, because “we wouldn’t know what to do with them” is probably the worst argument you can make. America used that same argument to justify keeping slaves.
    There is simply no reason to cage fellow human beings because of what they choose to do to their own bodies. Marijuana is less harmful than tobacco and alcohol; yet, while selling the former can result in life imprisonment, selling the latter will get you Superbowl ads and billions of dollars worth of drug money.
    Furthermore, there’s a reason why the prison industry even exists–it’s big business at the expense of the American people. The US has the most prisoners in the world, as well as the highest prison population per capita. There are now more black people in prison or on parole than there were slaves in the 1800s. The prison industry also happens to be the fastest growing industry in the United State–so while car companies are failing and people are being laid off in other sectors, the prison industry is becoming more and more profitable.

  • Rainman

    Shout out to my boi Obama

  • http://slamonline.com charliewinning

    EJ, Ron Paul actually has admitted that the newsletters WERE HIS. You must have been under a rock because it was very recent that he actually wrote them after years of denials. Get more up to date.

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