Thursday, March 1st, 2012 at 12:40 pm  |  76 responses

Barack Obama Guarantees a Chicago Bulls Championship


According to President Obama, he will welcome the Chicago Bulls as world champs into the White House before he leaves office. From Grantland: “BS: Over the last five years, how many times have you envisioned welcoming the world champion Chicago Bulls to the White House? Obama: ‘Every year. And it hasn’t happened yet, but it will happen. BS: It will happen? You’re like Joe Namath — you’re guaranteeing it. Obama: ‘Well, I’ve got another five years here and — [laughter] —’ BS: You’re guaranteeing that, too. [Laughter.] Obama: — ‘somewhere along the line my Bulls are going to come through here. Absolutely.’ BS: You’ll probably cry. You’ll well up a little bit. Obama: ‘I probably won’t do the whole Jordan-hugging-the-ball thing.’ BS: Right. Him lying on the ground. [Laughter.] Obama: ‘That would be a little extreme. I’ll be pretty happy, though.”

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  • http://www.fiba.com Darksaber

    Man that’s unorthodox campaigning.
    How the hell did Bill Simmons set this up?
    Impressive coup.

  • blakos

    Shout out to USA’s Imperialistic foreign policy

  • blakos

    Shout out to US Society’s super anvanced and corporate version of patronage

  • http://www.facebook.com/joe.l.brewer3 BlackPhantom

    Shoutout to George W. Bush probably being Alestier Crowley’s grandson…

  • http://www.facebook.com/joe.l.brewer3 BlackPhantom

    Shoutout to the “mad prophet of the airwaves” Howard Beale.

  • http://www.facebook.com/joe.l.brewer3 BlackPhantom

    Yeah I know Howard Beale’s only a character- I don’t care, that movie was so far ahead of it’s time.

  • http://www.tampax.com DYWM

    “If this economy hasn’t turned around in four years, it’s on me.” – Barack Obama, 2008

  • http://www.nba.com Red

    This might be my favorite thread, ain’t nobody arguing, say whaaaat.

  • IamYou

    Obama we comin fo you N*gga!

  • http://www.slamonline.com spit hot fiyah

    shoutout to alex jones

  • http://www.yahoo.com The Fury

    Shout out to Slamily for these wise comments

  • http://slamonline.com samoaninlondon

    shout out to the bilderberg committee

  • Yesse

    I dont think this is helping him getting re-elected.

    What this has to do with politics anyway?

  • KidCongo

    Shout out to Mulder

  • http://slamonline.com datkid

    ugh I hate all of you lol. lakeshow, don’t be silly republicans DEFINITELY hate obama more bc he’s black. There’s no question. and it’s not personal but F*CK Ron Paul and his racist @ss newspaper…. also I’d like to thank teddy for not going on an anti-american rant again.

  • Guest

    how about you Guarantee more jobs for our country. How about you Guarantee bringing back our troops in iraq/afghanistan home. Everything that comes out your mouth is garbage. Vote RON PAUL. That mans the Truth.

  • http://slamonline.com nbk

    if you like your presidents with two first names

  • charliewinning

    Shout out to Ron Paul’s ideas on American foreign policy. F his racist rants and presidential bid.

  • http://slamonline.com LakeShow

    datkid, You sound incredibly stupid when you use blanket statements like that. You sound like an absolute fool. My parents are Republicans and they aren’t racist so you are immediately found wrong about that. It sounds incredibly ignorant to place 40% of Americans voters as racist. Again I ask, were those same people being racist when they wanted Bill Clinton impeached? Thank you, thank you, and I bid you adieu.

  • EJ

    Obama very liberal?? lmao
    And “Ron Paul’s racist @ss newspapers” weren’t really his. He had no idea somebody was publishing them, and I believe him. He’s pretty much the only republican who has not said anything racist during their campaign, as far as I know.

  • http://thetroyblog.com Teddy-the-Bear

    Technically, every American president is racist because they support the War on Drugs and the federal death penalty, which are both fundamentally racist. Ron Paul is the only candidate who will end the War on Drugs.
    He’s also the only candidate who doesn’t want to invade Iran and spark World War III.

  • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F4DgcYc0jJw EJ

    Click my name. I think people should take this more into consideration when Ron Paul and the war on drugs are being discussed.

  • http://thetroyblog.com Teddy-the-Bear

    @ EJ: No offense, but that video is complete nonsense. The guy in the video has zero idea of what he’s talking about.
    First of all, Ron Paul has never said he would cut welfare and social programs immediately. Most of his cuts (unlike EVERY other US president of the past century) would come out of the military budget, and that would be enough to kick-start the economy. He is a libertarian but he has also said, very clearly, that libertarianism does not work until people have the means to support themselves. That means he would NOT cut medicaid or welfare until the economy was back on track and businesses were employing people.
    Furthermore, the amount of money it costs tax payers to house these convicts far exceeds the amount of money it costs to give people social aid. If it’s between providing people with social aid where they can contribute to society and providing people with basic means to survive in cages, which makes the most sense? And that’s just the economic argument.

  • http://thetroyblog.com Teddy-the-Bear

    The idea that we shouldn’t release non-violent drug offenders, most of them having been imprisoned via racial discrimination, because “we wouldn’t know what to do with them” is probably the worst argument you can make. America used that same argument to justify keeping slaves.
    There is simply no reason to cage fellow human beings because of what they choose to do to their own bodies. Marijuana is less harmful than tobacco and alcohol; yet, while selling the former can result in life imprisonment, selling the latter will get you Superbowl ads and billions of dollars worth of drug money.
    Furthermore, there’s a reason why the prison industry even exists–it’s big business at the expense of the American people. The US has the most prisoners in the world, as well as the highest prison population per capita. There are now more black people in prison or on parole than there were slaves in the 1800s. The prison industry also happens to be the fastest growing industry in the United State–so while car companies are failing and people are being laid off in other sectors, the prison industry is becoming more and more profitable.

  • Rainman

    Shout out to my boi Obama

  • http://slamonline.com charliewinning

    EJ, Ron Paul actually has admitted that the newsletters WERE HIS. You must have been under a rock because it was very recent that he actually wrote them after years of denials. Get more up to date.

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