Last Week in Las Ligas

By Jake Appleman & Oliver Price 

La Liga + UEFA CUP:  

Real Madrid 4 Athletic Bilbao 1

Barcelona 1 Levante 0 (An interesting video shot live from the stands.)

Sevilla 3 Espanyol 1 (UEFA CUP FINAL PREVIEW!!!!) But, man, talk about an overdone video. Even so, I was there a month ago, drinking Cruzcampo, so now I’m in tears…Amazing third goal from Chevanton, who scores while on the ground.) 

Osasuna 2 Zaragoza 2

Getafe 1 Real Sociedad 0

Racing Santander 0 Deportivo 0

Villareal 3 Nastic 0

Mallorca 3 Celta Vigo 0

Atletico Madrid 0 Betis 0 (damn!)

Valencia 2 Recreativo Huelva 0


Sevilla 2 Osasuna 0

(Sevilla advances.)

Espanyol 2 Werder Bremen 1

(Espanyol advances.)

Break out the ham, the Uefa Cup final is going to be an all Spanish affair.

England and Champs Lge:

Soooo- lots of stuff this week as Chelsea drop a proverbial bollock by drawing with Bolton, basically handing the title to Manchester United who somehow came from two goals down to score four in half an hour to spank the rowdy blue side of Liverpool by four goals to two.

On to the action

Champions League

Manchester United 3-2 AC Milan

Even I was starting to get impressed by Manchester United’s ‘refuse to lose’ week which began here with a glorious second half fight back behind the ‘goal machine’ Wayne Rooney who went from zero to hero over the last few weeks with his impressive performances-

Chelsea 1-0 Liverpool

Didier Drogba is an absolutely fantastic player- his set up for Joe Cole is a true thing of beauty-


Portsmouth 2-1 Liverpool

Middlesbrough 2-3 Tottenham

Blackburn 4-1 Charlton

Wigan 0-3 West Ham

Don’t look now but it looks like West Ham may have actually woke up and realised championship football stinks- and supposedly Wigan will use if they go down and West Ham stay up over the Carlos Tevez fiasco (who I might add the Hammers would be down without already)

Man City 0-2 Aston Villa

Everton 2-4 Manchester United

Quite honestly the softest half of football I have ever seen from a top tier team (bare in mind that I have seen West Ham play a few times this season) as Everton lie down and gift the Manc’s a simple win… Goal one, keeper drops it, goal 2, own goal from ex Man U player Phil Neville (where are you with the conspiracy theories Jose) goal 3, awful pass by generic awful Everton defender finds Ronaldo who gives it to Everton’s least favourite player Mr Wayne Rooney to score, Goal 4- maybe the worlds skinniest man runs half the length of the field unchallenged and is basically asked politely to shoot on his right foot despite clearly having no left foot at all…way to go Toffees- that’s a lesson in how to be utterly dismal (Ryan your thoughts please?) (sorry about the techno music)

Chelsea 2-2 Bolton

And so it ends here- Mourinho, for reasons only known to himself fields a weakened squad against the giant-killing Bolton…didn’t really pay off in the long term either seeing as Russian Oil FC tumbled out of Europe too…Could this mean Mourinho tumbling out of a job as well?

Arsenal 3-1 Fulham

No surprise here as the Gunners lay a whipping on one of the weakest teams in the league- Wenger, after the game, addressed an issue I have long bemoaned in my beloved Gunners- how we create a silly amount of chances but barely convert any… So Arsene what are you going to do about it? (hint-SPEND SPEND SPEND)-

Reading 1-0 Newcastle

Michael Owen returns!! Not that it makes much difference to the usual Toon score

Champions League

Liverpool 1-0 Chelsea (‘Pool win 4-1 on penalties)

A truly dismal game of football decided in the worst possible way-I’m sure I wont speak for everyone when I say Liverpool may win games in Europe but boy they don’t half make it look bad (the game) (pens)

AC Milan 3-0 Manchester United (Milan win 5-3 on aggregate)

Yikes! And there I was blowing the Manc’s trumpet.. Shows what I know- everything seemed against ManU from the start as they were blown away by the teamwork of Milan- Fergie was tactically outclassed in this one as Milan whupped the Premiership pace setters to set up a 2005 Euro final rematch against the red half of the Scouse-

In other news Nuggets owner Stan Kroenke (the dude that brought AI to Denver) may be considering a ‘hostile’ takeover attempt of Arsenal- As I have said before- the guy knows nothing of football and just wants to make a profit. In the words of the ‘immortal’ Peter Hill- Wood ‘we don’t want his type’ keep your money Stan- we’ll do just fine without you.- anyone who loves Arsenal who wants to pump money in however, is welcome

And yet more West Ham have been fined 11 million dollars for the illegal signing of Carlos Tevez and Javier Mascherano- BUT have not been docked any points- something Wigan are up in arms about and threatening to sue!