A Couple Knicks Lists

by Russ Bengtson

Five guys who have less job security than Isiah Thomas:

1. The Pope
2. Fidel Castro
3. Clarence Thomas
4. Chris Berman
5. God

Five things Isiah could do and still not get fired:

1. Sign Michael Vick to a five-year deal for the full mid-level exception.
2. Park in Jimmy Dolan’s parking space every day.
3. Trade David Lee, Malik Rose, Quentin Richardson, Nate Robinson and a No. 1 to the Bulls for Ben Wallace.
4. Accidentally set Madison Square Garden on fire.
5. Take over coaching the Liberty, too.

Five people who dress worse than Jim Dolan on a semi-regular basis:

1. Charley Rosen
2. Andrew Bogut
3. Bjørk
4. Britney Spears
5. Duane Chapman

Five former Knicks who could help the team right now:

1. Marcus Camby
2. Latrell Sprewell
3. Allan Houston
4. Bernard King
5. Richie Guerin

Five combinations of players the Knicks could have had instead of Eddy Curry:

1. LaMarcus Aldridge and Thaddeus Young
2. Tyrus Thomas and Acie Law IV
3. Rudy Gay and Joakim Noah
4. Brandon Roy and Spencer Hawes
5. Ronnie Brewer and Sean Williams

Ten things Isiah Thomas has said about 11 additions:

1. “Everything this team needs, he brings to the table.” (Channing Frye.)

2. “It’s more of a future thing, but we definitely won’t hold him back from doing something for us right now.” (Randolph Morris)

3. “I think we’re catching him at the right time of his career. They always say big guys take time to develop.” (Jerome James)

4. “His talents and his skills, they speak for themselves. But his intangibles… How do you find that person? He just balances the group and makes it work. It’s not a matter of solving a problem, it’s a matter of tilting everything to make it all balance. He balances the team, both a person and as a player. We are extremely lucky to have him.” (Jared Jeffries)

5. “Jalen is a person who fits exactly what we need. A very versatile player, he can handle the ball in the backcourt, he can score from the small forward position and he can take some of the scoring load off some of our younger players who have been asked to score at difficult times during the game.” (Jalen Rose)

6. “Tim Thomas is a young, versatile small forward who suits our style of play very well, and Nazr Mohammed is a strong front-court player who will help us with rebounding and interior defense. Although we had to part with two quality players and individuals, we felt this trade makes us better now and in the future.”

7. “This is a trade that we all feel makes us a better basketball team for both now and in the future. In Steve, we add an All-Star caliber player to our team without giving up core assets that are key to our future.” (Steve Francis)

8. “I think we are catching him at a good and unique time in his life.” (Vin Baker)

9. “Malik is a high-energy player, and the fans are going to enjoy watching him play. In terms of his salary, a guy like Malik who is making $5 or $6 million a year is worthy of that contract. The two or three additional years that he has, I’m very comfortable paying those numbers. Those are not $12, $13 or $14 million numbers.” (Malik Rose)

10. “Our goal is to win an NBA championship, and our goal is to put together a team that can do that… You just don’t get a chance to get these superstar players and have them be on your team in this day and age.” (Stephon Marbury)