Links: Live Lottery Notes

by Lang Whitaker

I’m nervous. Watching the lottery as I write this because otherwise I’ll be pacing around my apartment. I was so worked up tonight that I walked home the 60 blocks from the office. Hawks beat writer Sekou Smith called me earlier from Jersey to try and talk me into coming out to the lottery. Can’t do it, I told him. But if the Hawks win the lottery, I told him, we’re going to Scores tonight. Lap dances on me.

I don’t really care how this shakes out if the Hawks don’t get one of the top three picks. Except I do feel that Boston has no business getting a top pick. They’ve already won, what, like 15 NBA Championships? And they just won a World Series and a few Superbowls? And then they blatantly tried not to win games all season? And Danny Ainge already tried to recruit Kevin Durant’s mom?

The Celts deserve a long stretch of losing. It’s called karma. Welcome to reality.

Earlier this season I was advocating the Hawks tanking games, but in retrospect I’m glad they didn’t do that, because it just wouldn’t feel right. At least this way if we lose the pick I won’t feel so bad — it’s just how things shook out.

The Sternbot is on now with Fred Hickman. He says his job is to uphold the rules and that he was just upholding the rules when he suspended Amare and Boris. I see Tommy Heinsohn in the background talking to Jerry West. Can’t tell if Heinsohn has a flask or not. What is Jerry West doing there? Isn’t he out in Memphis? When are Brian Davis and Christian Laettner going to buy the team and transform the downtown area?

Commercials. Still nervous. Man does this suck.

Time to meet the representatives. Hornets sent George Shinn’s son. Larry Bird in the house! He needs to grow his mustache back. A fifth Maloof brother is there for the Kings. I think his name is Kenny. Randy Foye and Brandon Roy are there for their respective teams. Foye wins the battle of having the biggest oversized watch.

Wow! Lenny Wilkens is there sitting next to Dominique! I hope Nique punches him out for trading him to the Clippers. This has to be a sign.

Here we go…

14. Clippers
13. Hornets
12. Philadelphia 76ers
11. Pacers (to the Hawks!)
10. Sacramento Kings
9. Chicago Bulls
8. BETcats
7. Minnesota
6. Milwaukee Bucks
5. Boston Celtics!!!!!!!!
4. Memphis!!!!!!!

Sorry Phoenix! Commercial!!!!! Holy crap! Holy crap! Well, karma caught up with the Celts. I can’t complain if the Hawks finish third here, but I really want the one spot.

I’ve never been so happy in my life to see the Grizzlies logo pulled from an envelope.

If I was at the Lottery I would have vomited on David Stern by now.
We’re back as they show Celtics fans in shock…I laugh heartily. Here we go…
3. Atlanta
2. Seattle
1. Portland

Well, I can live with that. I still wish Dominique would have suplexed Lenny Wilkens. Portland’s gotta take Oden, right? And Seattle/Vegas/Oklahoma City’s gotta take Durant, right? Or are there any French guys Seattle can take?