NBA Coaches Are Idiots

by February 02, 2007
5

by Lang Whitaker

Really, that’s the only way I can figure to explain it. Did you see some of the guys who made the All-Star teams? Did you see some of the guys who didn’t make the All-Star teams?

I’ve got a ton of questions about all this…

What are the qualifications needed to be an All-Star? Are we going by your team’s record? Is that why Rip Hamilton made the team?

If record is paramount, how does the team with the best record in the NBA get 1 player on the team, while the team behind them in the standings get 3 players?

How does the leading NBA’s leading scorer not make the team? Do all those Western coaches really want to get Melo fired up?

As TNT’s David Aldridge said: “I don’t know what Carmelo Anthony has to do to make an All-Star team, I think it’s a travesty. He should have made the team ahead of Allen Iverson because both of them missed significant periods of time this season. Iverson scored a lot of points for his team in Philadelphia and they lost, Carmelo scored a lot of points for his team in Denver and for the most part they won. They haven’t really played together all that much, so if you’re going to judge them individually, and I love AI, I think you have to say Carmelo’s season has been more successful than Allen’s.”

My biggest question: How the hell did Joe Johnson not make the All-Star team? Seriously, how the hell did Vince Carter make the team over Joe Johnson? If anyone can explain that to me using logic and facts, I’m listening.

I read the other day that Lawrence Frank was going to call the other coaches around the East to stump for his Nets. Well, I don’t know what he promised them — maybe he swore he wouldn’t defend last second inbounds plays? — but it worked.

The coaches know the Nets are 22-24, right? So they get two guys on the team? Kidd deserves it, if only for the off chance that Joumana shows up in Vegas. But Vince? Vince?

“I think a guy like Joe Johnson, he’s an all-star,” Chauncey Billups told reporters in Detroit. “I think he’s one of the best guards in the conference, and he didn’t get in. But I think he’s an All-Star.”

Chauncey’s right.

Jermaine O’Neal? Averaging the fewest points per game since 2002.

Rip Hamilton? Statistically he’s having his best season ever and the Pistons are the best team in their Division, so it’s hard to find fault there.

Marc Stein is all testy about Michael Redd not making it, and Redd should have made it, but I’m assuming the coaches didn’t vote for him because they know he couldn’t play in the game anyway.

No Bulls players?

No Josh Howard? No Emeka Okafor? What’s going on?