T-Mac, Ballgate and Benny the Bull

by Lang Whitaker

“I feel like the president of Argentina.” — Andres Nocioni, on taking an open-air bus ride through Chicago.

“Steve Nash found guys out of the back of his head; it was crazy.” — Rodney Carney, on playing against Nash for the first time.

“It’s not 30 million a year. It’s only five.” — Isiah Thomas, on Jerome James’ contract.

• The David Stern Robot says he’s not worried about the new ball, because everyone also had complaints about the new World Cup ball when that was introduced but they eventually got used to it. But as I recall, that was about the ball not flying straight and true, not about the surface being impossible to get a grip on.

• The Bulls took an open bus ride through Chicago, and someone threw a turnip at Benny the Bull. Hey, if they want to take their life into their own hands, that’s their choice.

• I read somewhere the other day about Rasheed hoping to be named one of the captains of the Pistons. Shaft.

• Not only is Jerome James injured, but everyone involved seems completely confused about what’s going on. The Daily News quotes JJ as quoting the doctor saying “something about a cyst.” (That entire story is kind of funny, actually.) The Post says JJ tore scar tissue in a cyst. And the Times says there’s torn scar tissue from a cyst. It’s all about as confusing as Jerome James himself.

• Might not be such a good idea for Bassy, Gerald Green and Allan Ray to be hanging out at a mall in Cleveland where high school girls are stalking them. I’m just saying.

• Brian Skinner’s goatee is amazing…I think it has waves.

• Also, Delonte West isn’t going with the Celts to Toronto because of his sore back, but also because he didn’t renew his passport.

• Someone in Minnesota better keep an eye on Paul Shirley. Can we get him Dr. Phil’s number or something?
• Mark Cuban teaches us how to steal video and audio from YouTube.

• Earl Watson had a tooth knocked out yesterday, and Bob Hill found it on the floor.

• The cops in Indy are really going all-out to find out who owns the weed.

• T-Mac is back.

• Nellie wants Ike Diogu to get with the program.

• The Nets had a three-point shooting contest which was won by Jason Kidd and Nenad Krstic.