The Redicks Will Fight Text You!

by Marcel Mutoni

Say what you will about former Duke Blue Devils – that they’re injury prone; or that they aren’t exactly the greatest winners at the pro level – but never question their gulliness.

Especially if the Dookie in question is Orlando Magic guard J.J. Redick, one of the great poets of our time. Should you cause him any kind of pain, specifically, pain of the heart, he will go after you. Or at least get his brother to do it for him:

Vanessa Lopez said she is afraid for her life because of harassing phone calls and text messages from David Redick.

Lopez said David Redick told her, “You will be sought after, and you should be scared.”

“The victim has received multiple phone calls, threatening in nature, offensive in nature. Pretty much that’s all we know so far,” Lake Mary police officer Mike Connely said.

Now, that’s the kind of geeky toughness you can expect to have instilled in you if you play for Coach K.

(Tip o’ the hat: Deadspin)