The DeAndre Jordan Free Agency Decision has officially reached the DEFCON 1 level.

Members from both the LA Clippers and Dallas Mavericks are in Houston this very moment (via planes, trains, automobiles and banana boat), where the big fella works out and makes his offseason home, to convince him to sign on the dotted line.

Jordan is said to be having second thoughts about taking the Mavs’ $80 million over four seasons; the Clips are hoping to show him the love and adulation he so desperately craves—not to mention $110 million in salary over five years—in a last-ditch effort.

And now, here are a bunch of funny emojis (plus a Paul Pierce old-man gaffe) from the concerned parties.

Got all that? Good.

Yahoo! Sports sums up the madness:

The Clippers have a strong, renewed hope that Jordan is on the cusp of changing his mind and could return to them, league sources said. […] Jordan is working out in Houston and expected to meet with a Rivers-led Clippers contingent Wednesday afternoon, sources said.

 

Jordan committed to signing a four-year, $80 million deal with the Mavericks on July 3, but can’t sign any deal until the league’s moratorium is lifted on Thursday. Dallas became aware of the Clippers’ renewed pursuit on Wednesday morning and is planning an aggressive response, sources said.

 

Clippers All-Star Chris Paul – whose poor relationship with Jordan played a part in the center’s original decision to sign with Dallas – has returned to the mainland United States after a vacation and expressed a willingness to join Rivers and Clippers officials in Texas to meet with Jordan, league sources said.