By Sam Rubenstein

Mutoni is unavailable at the moment, but this is one of those critical issues that demand immediacy. NBA icon Charles Oakley was arrested early this morning in Georgia when cops observed him driving erratically. The Oak Man was under the legal limit, so it’s not a DUI, but was charged with impaired driving. From The Smoking Gun:

Though a Breathalyzer test showed Oakley’s blood alcohol content was below the state limit, the former New York Knicks forward (who turned 44 today) was charged with impaired driving (state law makes it a crime if a motorist is “under the influence of alcohol to the extent that it is less safe for the person to drive”). A cooperative Oakley, who was nabbed around 3 AM, was also cited for failure to maintain a lane

Happy Birthday! Charles spent three hours in jail. In that time, 10 inmates complained of headaches caused by a blunt instrument resembling a human forearm. It’s appropriate that hours after the New York Knicks reached a new level of softness, their most rugged fan favorite ex-player would get himself locked up.

Even though I’m having fun with this, drunk driving is not a joke.

Then again, neither is Oak.