Tuesday, November 4th, 2008 at 5:08 pm  |  69 responses

Links: The Dirty Thirty Returns!

It’s ba-ack…

by Lang Whitaker

When Ryne came on board here at SLAM, we talked about a bunch of ideas for the site. One of which was power rankings, which were originally done by Sam and were called The Dirty Thirty. I told Ryne I wanted to pick up the power rankings, and so…this. Here we are. And the plan is to update this bad boy once a week, probably on Tuesdays.

I’m basing these rankings on evidence neither scientific nor empiric. No, these rankings are based solely on my own sense and sensibility. (Word to Jane Austen!) I know there will be some anomalies as we surge ahead, but I make no excuses. (Unless I make an excuse.)

Until then…let’s get Dirty…

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  • witness


  • witness

    the blazers should be higher and the sixers.

  • http://www.shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com Eboy

    Perhaps the worst Dirty Thirty I’ve ever read…..complete sh*t.

  • witness

    remember the rockets are missing their best perimeter defender! but they are in the perfect spot.

  • http://joebasketball.blogspot.com Joe

    That lil Wayne comment is priceless

  • http://www.shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com Eboy

    Oh….and haven’t the Pistons blown out every team they’ve played and played one of those games without a starting point guard? Oh that’s right…..they did. And brought in one of the greatest scoring guards of all time….yeah, they should be seventh on the list….get the fu*k out of here with this.

  • http://slamonline.com/ Ryne Nelson

    I’ll be driving the Rockets bandwagon all year. Caputo, Scoop and Kenny Smith are on board. Are you?!

  • http://slamonline.com/ Ryne Nelson

    @Joe: When Oden plays more than one quarter, Wayne will be taking that back asap.

  • http://shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com/ TADOne

    Ok, should I blame Ryne or Lang for saying Detroit has given up on this season?? Are ya’ll f*cking serious?!?

  • http://www.hoopsvibe.com/christopher_sells-authorHV106.html chiqo

    when weezy said that, did he use the voice manipulator?

  • http://shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com/ TADOne

    Lil’ Wayne commenting on the NBA is like Ashley Simpson making good music: doesn’t make a damn bit of sense.

  • http://AllAbout-Penis-Enlargement.com Jukai

    Okay, someone explain to me how the $#*$ Arenas is ahead of Iverson?!?

  • http://www.neworleansnation.blogspot.com Toney Blare

    damn shame, too.

  • dOnRummY

    I wish the raps had a swing man that could drive the lane. If so, they could stay around 5, all year.

  • Krishan

    NOTE to SLAM: Don’t make lists, or anything resembling a list. People will go batsh!t.

  • http://slamonline.com Lang Whitaker

    I stand by Detroit at 7th. Yes, they’ve got 3 wins, but two of them were less than 10 points, and the teams they beat aren’t exactly contenders (Washington, Charlotte and Indy). The way I look at it, if I have to play against an NBA team tonight, I’d rather play against Detroit than any of those top 6 teams. Eboy’s just mad that I was right about the Heat.


    Huh? How is Detroit giving up on the season by getting AI? Lang, you are SLIPPING, YO! For real, I think I’d rather read about your visits to Starbucks. The only thing fishy is your opinion. Detroit should be 2 or 3 on that list. Wait until AI puts on the Red White and Blue of Motown. Pistons will win the East this year. Boston doesn’t want nothing to do with AI on this squad.

  • Mo

    Hornets should be #1 after the first week. 2 starters out and they still managed to go 3-0. And they’re leading the league in offense right now.

  • Mo

    SI.com is the only ranking that is right so far.

  • http://www.shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com Eboy

    Yes Lang, and the Lakers played feroscious competion in their three cakewalks….stop that party line bullsh*t…we all know your snuggling up to the taint of the LA boys this season. The two page spread in the new ish may as well been photoshopped with 2009 Championship t-shirts and a Larry O’Brien trophy. Also, I’m not mad at the Heat ranking either….I’ve come to expect ignorance regarding the squad and what they’re doing for the next couple of seasons.

  • http://www.shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com Eboy


  • http://LATESTCRY.WORDPRESS.COM akimana

    Fix the time on the comments

  • http://shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com/ TADOne

    Lang: Didn’t have any issue with the ranking, I had an issue with the comment that Detroit was “giving up on the season”.

  • http://www.shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com Eboy

    Don’t mind Lang, TAD, he’s one of “those” cats now…..you know, an instant Laker fan? Once they fail again in the playoffs,he’ll change his cubicle poster to CP3 and be hot on the Hornets in ’10.

  • http://idunkonthem.blogspot.com/ albie1kenobi

    Dear Lang,
    What is the purpose of the “sorting” capability of the list? Especially by comment?
    It is simply sort by the first letter of the first word of the comment. I find this functionality to be hilarious.

  • jrp14

    Actually Lil wayne commenting on the nba would be like Lil wayne making good music; it just doesnt make sense

  • http://shawn-kemps-offspring.blogspot.com/ TADOne

    That too jrp. I’ve blasted lil homie enough already though and wanted to give him a break.

  • Krishan

    LOL @ jrp

  • Ken

    The first D30 from last year had Miami ranked at #5. These rankings are tough so early in the season really.

  • Krishan

    @ken: Exactly. Although I do have a problem with lang ranking the clippers ahead of the kings. WHITAKER R U A CLIPPER FANBOI GETTAF*CKOUTTAHERE

  • Sean B

    lang you genius you are on the ball.

  • http://www.mybleedingfingertips.blogspot.com/ Myles Brown

    If you scared, say you scared…

  • http://slamonline.com Lang Whitaker

    @Albie: No idea why the tables can be sorted like that. It is kinda funny, though.
    @Eboy: If it makes you feel better, I still hate the Lakers.

  • http://idunkonthem.blogspot.com/ albie1kenobi

    @Lang: what’s even funnier is that when you sort by Team, it sees the number as a text (TAD knows what i’m talking about), and the ranking is all messed up after that. Try it.

  • EC

    jrp14 COsign. LIL WAYNE cant make good music to save his life. Only teenage girls and dudes under 21 like him cuz they dont know hip-hop. He’s the Marbury of Hip-hop. He said Oden was a bust cuz he hasnt proven himslef. Damn Wayne really? How bout you make a good track! Until then you’re a bust lil f@ggott!!

  • http://www.alllooksame.com Tarzan Cooper

    lang, the grizz are mucho fun to watch. rudy gay is a fu(kin superstar!!!!!

  • http://fjsdklf.com Jukai

    @EC: Why don’t you go sit in the corner and rage for a bit, okay Hitler?

  • http://www.where-basketball-b-longs.blogspot.com/ B. Long

    Like McDonalds, I’m lovin it!


    I guess AI and Lang ain’t friends.

  • http://www.where-basketball-b-longs.blogspot.com/ B. Long

    And Lil’Wayne has been in more nike basketball commericals than anyone commenting on here ever will. I’m just saying.

  • Tommy Patron

    Lay off Skiles!

  • http://www.triplejunearthed.com/dacre Dacre


    Jason Kidd has decided not to turn the ball over anymore… 8 assist to 1 to ratio!!
    and Nash can play 5 minutes less than every other PG and still be top 3 assists per game.

  • http://www.triplejunearthed.com/dacre Dacre


  • http://www.triplejunearthed.com/dacre Dacre

    San Antonio should not be above Atlanta. Switch up!

  • http://www.where-basketball-b-longs.blogspot.com/ B. Long

    The Grizzies are this years Blazers.

  • Pais

    I’m totaly with Lang & Lil Wayne on this one. As a basketball fan I hope to be proven wrong, but untill I actually see it, I reserve the right to remain mighty skeptical.

  • seppo

    lil wayne is right. oden might become a serviceable player someday. but he didn´t even dominate at ohio state. maybe on the defensive end, but i doubt that he will ever develop into a dominant scorer. oden averaged 14 points in high school.

  • Anton

    lol Terry Porter looks nothing like Rob Halford

  • http://double-technical.blogspot.com Zee

    Lake Show….ALL DAY. Lang, this year all your hate toward the Warriors is justified. And to all the haters, keep hating the Lakers. Like 50 says: “I need you to hate, so I can use you for your energy”, it’s gonna be a long season after all.

  • chintao

    Denver and San Antonio should be swapped. The Billups trade will push the Nugs toward the top, while the Spurs are looking kind of decrepit.

  • http://www.triplejunearthed.com/dacre Dacre

    Suns will be 4-1 and I expect them to be in the top 5 for the rest of the year after next week.

  • http://www.triplejunearthed.com/dacre Dacre

    75% midway through the 3rd quarter…THIS IS THE TEAM.

  • http://www.lkz.ch Darksaber

    wow, as if the nets were a quality opponent for the suns. DURRRTY thirty is baaack. Cool revival Ryne, Lang et al. Thanks

  • http://www.lkz.ch Darksaber

    W.O.W. Cnn just debuted live holograph tech on their “situation room” show and it didn’t look corny at all. Strangely enough it had the “dead Jedi aura” (recognize) glow around the person talking, odd. But still soooo cool. Finally, next step, Nba ball in 3d holographs in my living room. Please lord, make this happen in my lifetime??

  • Froggiestyle

    Obama Baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Teddy-the-Bear


  • Gaz

    Bobcats should be #30.
    Robert “Tractor” Traylor’s stale urine sample from ’98 >>> BETCATS.

  • http://slamonline.com Lang Whitaker

    @Darksaber: I loved the hologram.

  • http://www.lkz.ch Darksaber

    You bet Lang. They even used it on Will.i.am later on in the show when that slick rick of CNN (Anderson Cooper) interviewed him via Hologram (well, THAT’S a new way to announce an interview, eh?) from Chicago. Poor Will looked like a long lost cousin of Greedo (Star Wars freaks know…) Tech is coooool though, and even very high Def.

  • http://www.lkz.ch Darksaber

    DAMN, yet another hate sentence from Gaz to good old Bet. Gotta be the 4th or fifth i’ve read in here, that stuff is deeply rooted. Love the consistency, playa.

  • http://slamonline.com Sam Rubenstein

    Important fact about the Dirty 30: One of my inspirations for the name was when some woman on a reality show said “I’m 30, I’m flirty, and I’m dirty dirty.” Also, Holly had the Bulls way down there last season and people got all angry at her cause the Bulls were supposed to be one of the best teams in the East. See for yourself: http://slamonline.com/online/nba/2007/09/the-first-dirty-30-of-the-nba-season/
    Did they apologize later on? Doubt it. Remember that just in case the Pistons collapse this year. Just in case.

  • http://AllAbout-Penis-Enlargement.com Jukai

    … you watch Reality TV shows, Sam?

  • http://slamonline.com/ Ryne Nelson

    Sam, thanks for pointing that out…I think Russ still needs to hold true to his promise to eat his Brent Barry replica Clips jersey.

  • tealish

    Is that line about the Pistons giving up on this year, an inside joke I don’t get?

  • Myung

    Hawks. 3-0. Three wins against Playoff teams from last year. A road win in Orlando. A home win against Philly (from down 23 points). A road win against New Orleans. Good night.

  • http://www.hibachi20.blogspot.com Hursty

    Hawks beat the Hornets! What is going on?
    PS- Joe Johnson is the truth/beast. No, Im not a bandwagon type supporter of him- 05 Suns. Recognise.

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