Sunday, June 30th, 2013 at 12:27 pm  |  28 responses

Dallas Restaurant Offers Dwight Howard Free Chicken Fingers For Life if He Signs With Mavs

Not that this will sway Dwight Howard’s free agency decision too much…but it can’t hurt, you know? Per the Dallas Morning News (via EOB): “As the wooing of Dwight Howard officially begins, Dallas-Fort Worth-area Raising Cane’s restaurants are offering free-agent center Howard food for thought – for the rest of his life. On Monday, Raising Cane’s will kick off a campaign inviting Mavericks fans to help persuade Howard to sign with Dallas. The company has leased six electronic billboards to help publicize its cooked-up offer to Howard. Raising Cane’s marketing manager Adam Reed says that if Howard signs with the Mavericks, ‘he will be welcome to come by any of our (20) local restaurants to enjoy seriously delicious chicken fingers at any time, on us, for the rest of his life.’ Last week, the Lakers had seven billboards posted in the Los Angeles area with a capital-letters plea to Howard to STAY. But if the way to 6-foot-11, 265-pound Howard’s heart is through his stomach, the Mavericks might one-up the Lakers and Houston, which have yet to offer edible inducements, let alone a lifetime supply.”

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  • spit hot fiyah

    hmmmm, if u really like chicken fingers, there is a looooot of money to be saved here

  • FritzLn


  • Teddy-the-Bear

    > Makes 20 mil a year.
    > Is the one that deserves free sh!t.

    Such is the logic of Amurica.

  • playa

    It’s OVA, Dwight’s IN.

  • Conor

    They earned it!… genetically.

  • spit hot fiyah

    watermelon would have been worse, that would be some donald sterling s#!t

  • Caboose

    Say he eats 2 orders a week
    $10 per order
    52 weeks in a year
    60 more years of chicken fingers

  • danpowers

    he wont live 60 more years if he eats that much junk lol

  • Nathan Shane Long

    somebody needs to offer Dwight Howard CONDOMS for life

  • spit hot fiyah

    clippers: we have doc rivers
    mavericks: we have free chicken fingers


    Shoulda payed for his child support instead

  • Teddy-the-Bear

    Actually they do earn it, and I wasn’t complaining about their wealth.

    Something tells me you’re not okay with black athletes being wealthy, but you’re okay with rich white parasites making billions of dollars off the backs of these athletes while literally sitting on their @sses.

    That’s the kind of “free sh!t” I was really talking about–the chicken fingers is just a microcosm of the real “welfare” and thievery that happens on a systemic basis in the USA.

  • https://twitter.com/jasontichenor Mr. Wet

    an Eddy Curry reference is hiding in here somewhere.

  • mach

    Dwight can retire early. INSTANT FOOD!!!!

  • ZOGS


  • hoodsnake

    How bout human fingers to improve his FT accuracy

  • smith, stopped, smith blocked.

    the denver nuggets offers 9 year-old, 4 foot-2, 100 pounds, elementary school point-guard cheesy poofs for life if he stays healthy.

  • CJ42

    You’re a joke. As if any of us “common” folk can relate to the f*cking billionaire team owners. Stop making stupid sh!t like this about race and maybe America will be able to see some real progress

  • Miresslemes1989

    мy coυѕιɴ ιѕ мαĸιɴɢ $51/нoυr oɴlιɴe. υɴeмployed ғor α coυple oғ yeαrѕ αɴd prevιoυѕ yeαr ѕнe ɢoт α $1З619cнecĸ wιтн oɴlιɴe joв ғor α coυple oғ dαyѕ. ѕee мore αт…­ ­ViewMore——————————————&#46qr&#46net/kkEj

    the denver nuggets offers 9
    year-old, 4 foot-2, 100 pounds, elementary school point-guard cheesy
    poofs for life if he stays healthy.

  • Junior Taylor

    BS…the idea that ignoring racism and acting like it doesn’t exist will lead to the eradication of racism in the US and worldwide has to be one of the dumbest idea I have ever heard of.

  • EJ

    Those rich white parasites also earn their money, unless some of them are also bankers ofc..

  • RunNGun

    That’s WACIST! SMH! Really… chicken fingers? Someone needs to be slapped with the back of the hand.

  • Dfrance

    Remember he came into the league as this big God-fearing Christian? Lmao

  • Max

    Spread your seeds.

  • bike

    Some candy company needs to jump in here. Dwight loves candy. That might sway him.

  • Mars

    And let the racist outcries begin…but to be perfectly honest, I am sure no one would turn down this offer if it were entertained to them. Dirk eats free too

  • allen3

    from his wikipedia page
    Before he was drafted in 2004, Howard said that he wanted to use his NBA career and Christian faith to “raise the name of God within the league and throughout the world”.

    guess there is no better way than spreading his own “GOD fearing” seeds

  • Shooting Guard

    man how do you come up with these comments??? lol