Jeff Van Grumpy’s Desperation Heave

by Lang Whitaker

So I got to work this morning and got my laptop all hooked up and turned on, and everything froze — the cursor, the keys — and then the screen started blinking like a strobe light. This is not a good thing.

I go through computers pretty quickly, at least compared to everyone else around here, probably because I always travel with my laptop and I’m online all day and half the night. (I’d typed half the letters off the keyboard on this latest laptop.)

The thing is, whenever my computer breaks, the tech support guys here just give me a used laptop they’ve got laying around. Then, every four or five months, that will break and I have to get another used laptop. My thought is, wouldn’t it make sense for them to just invest in a new laptop that will probably last a few years, to save all of us the trouble of having to go through this every few months?

Similarly, if you own or work for a sports franchise, you can either spend some money right now and invest in the future or you can continue attempting to make quick fixes and come up with gimmicks to give the fans the impression that you care. Anyone remember the Hawks (in)famous Playoffs-or-bust money back guarantee a few years ago? Didn’t work out so well.

This brings us to Houston, where Jeff Van Gundy has announced that he has bought 50 season tickets, which will be distributed to the rowdiest Rockets fans they can find.

If Mark Cuban did the same thing, we’d hail him as a genius, pointing out that he’s doing his best to get the fans involved. At the same time, Mark Cuban has also spent way more money than any owner (well, other than the Dolans) over the last decade in an attempt to make the Mavs a contender.

Let’s applaud Van Gundy for thinking out of the box and trying to do something to get the fans interested. But at the same time, let’s point out that perhaps the best way to make our fans rowd, loud and proud is simply by spending the cost of those 50 season tickets on the team.